Thread: Turning 30? Watch out!

O.K., maybe the thread title is a bit over-dramatic but I make no apologies because for some this can be a truly life-changing time fraught with problems and confusion.

I’m no psychologist by any stretch, so why do I feel the need to mention this; I’m now in my fifties after all, surely I’m passed all that.

Well, yes and no.

Yes – I am beyond all that personally, and No – because NOBODY warned me!

We are all warned about the effects of puberty to one extent or another. Personally puberty wasn’t that bad for me; I didn’t turn pizza-faced with acne and I didn’t have massive mood swings. My transition to adulthood was relatively smooth although I did obviously get up to some shit that seems bizarre to me now.

It was turning thirty when all the things that I’d been warned of about puberty happened with me (except the acne) and it seems that this is not as uncommon as I previously thought – it wasn’t ‘just me’ although it hit me particularly hard.

In my late teens and throughout my twenties I believed I had life sussed. During the day I worked hard, studied hard, and in the evenings partied even harder. I had a fairly large group of friends and always seemed to know where the local house party was, and we were always welcome even without an invite – we usually brought more alcohol than we could drink (and that was quite a lot) and we never trashed the place.

Socially speaking it wasn’t really a shock that this this would all come to an end and by the time I was hitting my 30’s I’d pretty much had enough of this type of ‘fun’. Although this meant a big change in my life that wasn’t the problem, it was my choice after all even if I did miss it for a while.

Neither was it really the physical changes, after all we all know that our bodies change as we age through simple observation.

No, it was more the psychological changes, the changes in my thinking that I wasn’t prepared for.

I suddenly noticed that life wasn’t exactly going as expected. My career seemed to be stagnating, my group of friends was shrinking as they married off or their careers meant they moved away, I began questioning my political leanings, my religious beliefs had already been in question for some time, and last but certainly not least my expectations of having the perfect nuclear family life was brought to an abrupt end with the swallowing of my first massive red-pill. My confusion was enormous; everything I thought I knew was suddenly in question.

Add to this there was no-one to talk to as my friends were all going through their own shit so when we got together all we wanted was to forget our problems and have fun. Also the internet was only beginning so there was no understanding to be found there.

So be warned my friends, and this includes lurkers. If you are in your late 20’s early 30’s your life is about to change in ways you cannot imagine. And it doesn’t end there. Every decade brings its own unique challenges, changes and fears.

Understand you are not alone in this. Most of us go through the same turmoil you’re going through albeit in different ways and at different times.

Don’t think of this post as pessimistic fear mongering though, you do get through these things and life suddenly becomes good again, even better than before because with more experience comes new confidence. Going Your Own Way and putting aside the pressures that society inflicts on us frees us to be the people we truly are.

You are not the person you were 10/20 years ago, why would you think that would suddenly stop? You will not be the same person in 10/20 years’ time but there is nothing to fear in this, it is simply nature. Look forward to the new challenges life brings and you’ll be fine.



Edit:

Life's a journey, not a destination.

Aerosmith, Amazing.

Hmmm, 30, interesting number and the largest mile marker in my life!

Alcohol, tobacco, women, and womanizing, abruptly ended when I was 30 (except 1 more chance I took with a female 5 years later, and yes it failed dismally).

30s, purchased my home, restored my muscle car, rebuilt my home from the ground up, and purchased land up north. I remember so many "fuck thats" there too numerable to number, shitcaned long time lousy friends, started tolerating zero shit, rented ski houses, snowmobiled, and lived on top of my game! All possible because of 30! During that time many marriages I saw fail, many wives I saw cheating, 30s was my great awakening and the best time of my life! It was AWESOME! I was the poster-child for playboy(old definition), in all that time I had no regrets turning down pussy and all the bullshit that accompanies it! Time and and time again I walked past the open flowers (willing pussy) and didn't even bother to take a whiff or gaze upon their beauty, I had the scars on my heart and enough commonsense to avoid them.

Had I done what I did at 20 instead of 30 I would have avoided alot of misery, suffering, and emotional trauma! Better late than never! Perhaps in another time when dynamics were different I would have focused on settling down, but that wasn't the reality I was facing as most my married friends were miserable and in a constant state of struggles put on them unnecessarily and endlessly.

Yea, perhaps in a different time or altered state things would have been different but they aren't and that's what instigated and molded my MGTOW line of defense. After all the war on men and masculinity was thrust upon us all and not what mass media would have you believe, and the only way to fight any fight you're unwillingly shoved into is have an impeccable defense, even devoting your offense to defense whenever attacked, however, I reserve the right to attack without warning as part of the rules of war.

Originally Posted by mgtower

30s was my great awakening and the best time of my life!

This is true for me also, but only later. My early 30's, unlike you, meant selling my house, losing my job (and career) and leaving my home town and everything I ever knew behind in order to make a fresh start.

It was painful in ways I cannot begin to describe, but was it worth it? Absolutely! By my mid 30's I'd forged a new life, made new friends with open minds, and seen the world in a whole new light.

Life still has it's ups and downs, but generally speaking life for me now is great, I'm happy, and going MGTOW has a lot to do with that.

30 is when you become the age that your parents were when you were a child. Its the age at which there's no reason you should assume that your parents know better than you about various basic things.

I lost my religion at 33.

Damn, my 30s, which I am currently living (32 atm), are way way way more uneventful than that !

Of course, there are changes happening, some changes I am doing, and most of them positive so far, except a lil bit tummy fat which I need to get rid of asap. Other than that, all changes that I did, were some fine tunings, here and there, some bigger than others, but not even remotely as dramatic as OP !

Originally Posted by rkspsm

Damn, my 30s, which I am currently living (32 atm), are way way way more uneventful than that !

Of course, there are changes happening, some changes I am doing, and most of them positive so far, except a lil bit tummy fat which I need to get rid of asap. Other than that, all changes that I did, were some fine tunings, here and there, some bigger than others, but not even remotely as dramatic as OP !

Don't sweat it, it doesn't happen to everyone. Also with me there were a number of factors at play and, of course, no internet as such to allow me to allay many of my thoughts and fears.

Also, Going Your Own Way means you probably see the world in much clearer terms than I ever could have.