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  1. #1

    How to stop thinking about women?

    I feel like I'm against my own nature or perhaps female marketing is at all times high, I feel the pressure from my own subconscious whenever I go outside or anywhere on the internet some fine chick always picks up the interest of this monkey mind of mine, I do conscious effort to remind myself of this illusion but the unconscious is stronger.

  2. #2

    Re: How to stop thinking about women?

    If you dont mind saying, what age are you? In my 20's the only time i wasnt thinking about women was during intense workouts or endurance running.

  3. #3

    Re: How to stop thinking about women?

    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I feel like I'm against my own nature or perhaps female marketing is at all times high, I feel the pressure from my own subconscious whenever I go outside or anywhere on the internet some fine chick always picks up the interest of this monkey mind of mine, I do conscious effort to remind myself of this illusion but the unconscious is stronger.

    Hi, I have found with most forms of addiction, it goes away when you stop fighting ( evidently tge modern obsession with sex can be regarded as such ) . Now, I don't mean you give in mindlessly to your urges, but until your body/emotions understand what your intellect has grasped, it will be an uphill battle .
    Most addictions are really not stopped, but merely replaced, as they usually serve to occupy down time . While sex is a pleasant experience, the cultural narrative of chivalry and romance has clouded it with unrealistic expectations as regards the potential it has to create more positive impact in our lives. It's like a child who likes chocolate, later learns that, so do bacteria, but we have been continually told to believe the positive and take responsibility for the negative, hence when the fantasy falls flat, rather than acknowledge it for the delusion it really is, we pick ourselves up, dust our breeches and charge into the fray "one last time ", and hope it turns out right this time.
    The soultion I want to offer, is what I have found to be effective in dealing with this problem personally, your mileage might vary or you might even find a better way to apply it.

    First off, don't fight the urge for sex with feelings of guilt or shame, it's natural and until we find a way to create life direct from the ether, there's no need to feel less about a natural aspect of your being . But in the same vein, don't fall into the fantasy of trying to craft some grand epic romance around some booty call, do the deed and get on with your life's mission . A good analogy is the fact that no man fantasises about his hand after he has met "madam hand and her five daughters", it's the male desire for meaning that makes us fall into the trap of trying to validate a female's emotions, but her fantasy is different from your's, so eventually one person has to abandon their expectations, why should it be you ?

    Secondly, if you want to fight the urge, then pick your battles . Will power should be your go to but rather than trying to will it all to existence, it is important to understand that just like where a weight lifter pulling a muscle puts him out of commission for a while, pacing yourself is important . It might entail monitoring the media your consume, your friend circle or even where you go to for recreation . At least until you have more control over your own impulses. One failure can result in regression into blue pill behaviour, so self pacing is paramount.

    Furthermore, in regard to pacing yourself, even if you want to still engage with females, understand that you have to do so consciously, so as to avoid deluding yourself about the reality of your interaction with her . Don't condone toxic behaviour or try to pass it off as cute . Any such cop out results in a compromise in your values which a woman will continually push at until you either snap or you shove her back .Best to weed out such toxicity early . Decide early on whag you will and will not accept in essence whether romantic or otherwise .

    But most important I think , one has to have some form of frame work that gives their lives some stability . For some men it's a spiritual practice, for others intellectual or even physical . The important thing is that, you use that frame work as a contrast to determine what value a woman is having in your life . If her presence makes it difficult to pursue these things then maybe a rethink is in order . It's like the first statement I made, the human emotions and body are too primitive to comprehend intellectual proddings, so the easiest way is to provide a contrast where you can tangibly grasp the positive or negative impact certain decisions are having on your mind frame/life goals . In the long run, it's like the late Christopher Hitchens said about the bible and atheism, to steal his line a bit, with some artistic license of course, " the best proponent for not being in a romantic relationship with a woman, is actually being in one with a woman ". All you have to do is keep your eyes open and not start rationalising bad behaviour, any woman should shock you out of your delusions in a short while .

    Finally, I know this might not be for everyone, but there are practices in both psychology as a practice and also qigong which help to redirect the sexual impulses to other goals, if you are not averse to such, looking into it might help to provide more firepower to your arsenal .

    I hope you find my suggestions useful . Do have a great day .Cheers

  4. #4
    Member happybachelor's Avatar
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    Jan 2021
    UK (North)

    Re: How to stop thinking about women?

    Difficult to advise a younger man, if you are. I don't think I would have listened, I enjoyed my 'PUA' years. But I will tell you that looking back, they were a waste of time.

    Yes I had status among men for so many notches, but what is it worth now? Fuck all. I guess one benefit is all that experience has made me determined to stay MGTOW now. But I'm late thirties.

    You can't eradicate your instincts, but with strength of mind you can resist much temptation, and channel your drive into something productive for yourself.

    Do things you enjoy and which build you up. Sort out your finances and make money. I will probably be 50 now before I'm set for life. You could achieve this much earlier. Then if you want to pump and dump, it'll be like shooting fish in a barrel.

    Listen to older, wise men, and play the long game.
    I do not negotiate with terrorists.

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