Thread: Greetings! Glad to have found this forum.

Greetings!

I had never heard the term MGTOW before until literally yesterday, but after learning about what it meant I realize I have been one for more than 17 years. I divorced my wife back in 2005 because I was tired of being treated like complete dog shit all the time. I grew up in the punk scene in the 80's (I am now 51) so I have always believed in the ideals of equality, anti- racism, anti-authoritarianism and anti-sexism etc. When I met my wife and learned she had also been into the same kind of music (she was a year younger than me) we kind of hit it off and I assumed she would be a freedom loving open minded person like I am. She studied women studies and feminism stuff in college and I naively assumed that meant she would be all for us being equal in a relationship. That is how she seemed at first. Not much later though after marriage I realized that her version of equality meant I basically existed to serve her and cater to her every whim. If I ever disagreed with her (which was often) I was told I was dog shit and there was no meeting in the middle or compromise. It was her way or the highway etc. She was constantly demeaning and abusive even physically at times. I feel lucky to say though that I have been an introvert my whole life and being alone did not scare me. I have always valued my freedom and independence. So one day when she was out I packed up my car and left and soon filed for divorce after a 4 year relationship. I have a son with her who is now 20 and is turning into an amazing independent man whom I am extremely proud of. I ended up being his main parent for most of his life since his mother (my ex) turned out to not only be a selfish authoritarian partner but a crappy parent as well. My dad was never in the picture so I felt a strong duty and responsibility to be there for my son. I practically raised him myself which is something I am proud of and would not ever change even if I could.

After I got divorced I dated a girl for about a year. But it didn't work out. She was even upfront enough to tell me that she had known I wasn't "the one" for 6 months but stayed with me and pretended to like me basically because I had a nice apartment with comfortable amenities for her to hang out in while I was at work. She was very sweet on the outside but a complete fake and user in reality. After that I told myself I was done. No more! I will not allow myself to be used and treated like shit. I will be the one in charge of my own narrative. I have been single ever since and have never regretted it. Occasionally people ask me if I get lonely. I absolutely have not felt lonely in 17 years and I celebrate every minute of solitude. When people ask me why I remain single I usually say "I am retired from the game and I value my freedom". They usually laugh at this response as if I was joking around but the fact is I am dead serious about it. I am done playing that demeaning and shallow game. Every woman I have met was fake and a user. And not just the two I mentioned above. Oh sure they are not all like that and I shouldn't generalize, but this is my experience, and remains to be consistent the older I get. I am becoming an old man now which means I am ignored by almost all females, which is just fine to me. I remain my quiet and polite and aloof self. I listen to my music and read my books and play my games and bask in the beauty and resplendence of my independence and freedom and solitude!

I believe that most females from my ex-wife's generation down to the present have been indoctrinated to see men as nothing more than usable commodities. And even though it actually may be in the female nature to think that way anyway, I believe the later "waves" of feminism have exacerbated and maximized these tendencies.

Anyway, happy to find this forum of like minded men. Peace peace!!!

Originally Posted by John Don't

Greetings!

I had never heard the term MGTOW before until literally yesterday, but after learning about what it meant I realize I have been one for more than 17 years. I divorced my wife back in 2005 because I was tired of being treated like complete dog shit all the time. I grew up in the punk scene in the 80's (I am now 51) so I have always believed in the ideals of equality, anti- racism, anti-authoritarianism and anti-sexism etc. When I met my wife and learned she had also been into the same kind of music (she was a year younger than me) we kind of hit it off and I assumed she would be a freedom loving open minded person like I am. She studied women studies and feminism stuff in college and I naively assumed that meant she would be all for us being equal in a relationship. That is how she seemed at first. Not much later though after marriage I realized that her version of equality meant I basically existed to serve her and cater to her every whim. If I ever disagreed with her (which was often) I was told I was dog shit and there was no meeting in the middle or compromise. It was her way or the highway etc. She was constantly demeaning and abusive even physically at times. I feel lucky to say though that I have been an introvert my whole life and being alone did not scare me. I have always valued my freedom and independence. So one day when she was out I packed up my car and left and soon filed for divorce after a 4 year relationship. I have a son with her who is now 20 and is turning into an amazing independent man whom I am extremely proud of. I ended up being his main parent for most of his life since his mother (my ex) turned out to not only be a selfish authoritarian partner but a crappy parent as well. My dad was never in the picture so I felt a strong duty and responsibility to be there for my son. I practically raised him myself which is something I am proud of and would not ever change even if I could.

After I got divorced I dated a girl for about a year. But it didn't work out. She was even upfront enough to tell me that she had known I wasn't "the one" for 6 months but stayed with me and pretended to like me basically because I had a nice apartment with comfortable amenities for her to hang out in while I was at work. She was very sweet on the outside but a complete fake and user in reality. After that I told myself I was done. No more! I will not allow myself to be used and treated like shit. I will be the one in charge of my own narrative. I have been single ever since and have never regretted it. Occasionally people ask me if I get lonely. I absolutely have not felt lonely in 17 years and I celebrate every minute of solitude. When people ask me why I remain single I usually say "I am retired from the game and I value my freedom". They usually laugh at this response as if I was joking around but the fact is I am dead serious about it. I am done playing that demeaning and shallow game. Every woman I have met was fake and a user. And not just the two I mentioned above. Oh sure they are not all like that and I shouldn't generalize, but this is my experience, and remains to be consistent the older I get. I am becoming an old man now which means I am ignored by almost all females, which is just fine to me. I remain my quiet and polite and aloof self. I listen to my music and read my books and play my games and bask in the beauty and resplendence of my independence and freedom and solitude!

I believe that most females from my ex-wife's generation down to the present have been indoctrinated to see men as nothing more than usable commodities. And even though it actually may be in the female nature to think that way anyway, I believe the later "waves" of feminism have exacerbated and maximized these tendencies.

Anyway, happy to find this forum of like minded men. Peace peace!!!

Hi John Don't,

Thank you for your Intro.

She studied women studies and feminism stuff in college and I naively assumed that meant she would be all for us being equal in a relationship.

Yeah, that's never the case.

That is how she seemed at first. Not much later though after marriage

It takes years to get to know anybody, let alone tie yourself legally to another human being.

Anyway, you have seen the light.

At this time, as a new member please read our Principles by clicking on that word at the top of this page, in the black bar.

Thank you, and Welcome!

Welcome John Don't.

Do you live on Parker Street in Springfield, Mass?

Your story is identical to a dude I know!

I'm a long timer too, 25 years, off the plantation. 25 years, eyes wide open. 25 years, not playing the fool. 25 years, THE BEST TIME OF MY LIFE!

Originally Posted by mgtower

Do you live on Parker Street in Springfield, Mass?

Your story is identical to a dude I know!

I'm a long timer too, 25 years, off the plantation. 25 years, eyes wide open. 25 years, not playing the fool. 25 years, THE BEST TIME OF MY LIFE!

No I live in the midwest. But somehow I knew I would run into guys with similar stories here.

“If I ever disagreed with her (which was often) I was told I was dog shit and there was no meeting in the middle or compromise. It was her way or the highway etc.“

This, I believe, is hitting the ROCK BOTTOM in ANY relationship.

“So one day when she was out I packed up my car and left and soon filed for divorce after a 4 year relationship.”

THIS is what I call taking affirmative action. All the young or not-so-young guys out there, pay attention. Mental masturbation can only take you so far, this is sheer ACTION! And behold the beautiful consequence.

John Don’t, I’m already a fan. Welcome!

Lived in the Midwest for more than 8 years. Ain’t it beautiful!

Greetings for all! It's goiod to be here.

Originally Posted by shine745

Greetings for all! It's goiod to be here.

Thanks for being here! Time to pay the piper!

Hi John Don't - very similar story of slowly waking up. Like I realized I continued to volunteer for an emotional and psychological beating . . . and the problem was no longer her, but me. Years and years of trying to please her because I thought I had to. She had zero interest in being pleased; she was only entertained by the effort. Lesson learned (the hard way). Great story. Big fan of punk from LA in the 1980's myself. Welcome..