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  1. #1

    Smart video about women fed up with the dating market

    I don't even think the women this guy quotes is particularly obnoxious. She's not a fanatical man-bashing feminist. However, she does seem to suffer from major disconnect. She does not notice that the trashed dating market is largely a result of women's choices. I would say the following things have basically destroyed the dating market:

    1. Hypergamy run amok. Hypergamy existed in the past, of course. However, some things kept it in check such as religious expectations and societal pressure.
    2. Global connectivity. Women already had tough decisions in the past. An attractive women in the past would find, in her village, maybe 3 - 4 suitors, which could make for a tough choice if each suitor brought desirable traits to the table. Today she can go on a dating app and find 100 matches in an hour, without really knowing diddly squat about each one, other than what each one looks like in a photo and a few tidbits of info about him. It's information overload. Even if she does pick someone, she knows full well, she can easily just match up with hundreds more men and move on easily. Meanwhile, men are expected to invest large amounts of money in each date. Men inherently must invest a lot while women invest nothing in a possible relationship. The exception is the ultra-chads who get such absurd amounts of attention, they can just write "come over and we'll bang," and she'll probably do it. In the past, if a woman quickly and easily moved on to the next suitor over and over, she would been seen as fickle, or worse, as "easy." There were grave social consequences for that. Today, there are ZERO consequences. Even if someone expressed old-fashioned sentiments, she can counter with the popular "stop slut shaming." The so-called "slut shaming," or "expecting a virtuous woman" as it was once known, used to serve a useful purpose, which was to keep hypergamy in check.
    3. Overthrowing women's gender roles while keeping men's in tact. Women apply 21st-century values to women and 1950s values on steroids to men. Way back when, men were expected to pay for the courtship and to support a woman in marriage, but insanely expensive dates were not expected, except perhaps for the upper class. A good job with a respectable income is basically worthless today. Women unrealistically demand a rock star's income. A dude who actually is a rock star has way more women interested than he could possibly know what to do with.

    This is a really revealing video. Again, I don't even think this woman is particularly rotten or hateful. I just think she's out of touch.

    https://youtu.be/JZ_V_K5bBgM
    Last edited by TigPlaze; August 2, 2022 at 8:23 AM.

  2. #2
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    Re: Smart video about women fed up with the dating market

    OKCupid changed their format to suit women a few years ago and it led to women receiving fewer messages as well as women not liking the idea they had to go from a Username to using an actual first name on their profiles. Women got what they wanted and were pissed off with the results. Go figure.

    Another factor is dating sites went from being about profiles to being about photos. At one stage a profile with no or only partial info but had pretty pictures was considered highly suspect. Now it is the norm.

    Men know that they are playing a rigged game so many just mass message "Wanna fuck?" and hope for the best. I don't think many men take these sites seriously and I have read that most men delete their profiles within a day or two of joining a site.

    The expectations for men on these sites is far higher than it is for women. Women don't even meet their own standards. "Don't just say 'Hi' if you're going to message me, say something more than that!" then same woman will message "Hi" to guys and also respond with one word answers if anything at all.

    Society has also lost patience. It takes time to get to know someone, to build a connection. Women in particular want instant attraction. If they don't get the tingles the second you meet or see your photo than it's over. There was a reason there used to be a courting system back in the day.

  3. #3

    Re: Smart video about women fed up with the dating market

    Quote Originally Posted by Kryptic View Post
    OKCupid changed their format to suit women a few years ago and it led to women receiving fewer messages as well as women not liking the idea they had to go from a Username to using an actual first name on their profiles. Women got what they wanted and were pissed off with the results. Go figure.

    Another factor is dating sites went from being about profiles to being about photos. At one stage a profile with no or only partial info but had pretty pictures was considered highly suspect. Now it is the norm.

    Men know that they are playing a rigged game so many just mass message "Wanna fuck?" and hope for the best. I don't think many men take these sites seriously and I have read that most men delete their profiles within a day or two of joining a site.

    The expectations for men on these sites is far higher than it is for women. Women don't even meet their own standards. "Don't just say 'Hi' if you're going to message me, say something more than that!" then same woman will message "Hi" to guys and also respond with one word answers if anything at all.

    Society has also lost patience. It takes time to get to know someone, to build a connection. Women in particular want instant attraction. If they don't get the tingles the second you meet or see your photo than it's over. There was a reason there used to be a courting system back in the day.
    If they wanted to come up with a sane dating app, women would reject it. But if they had one, here's how it would work. First, dating profiles would not show the person's picture, and all profiles would be required to include at least 5 paragraphs of information about the person, what their likes, hobbies, etc. are. Each person would submit a picture, but you could not see it on their profile. You could choose to look at pictures, but only unconnected to to the profile. You could only look at pictures for the purpose of rating the person's looks from 0 to 10. From members scanning through pictures, everyone would have a looks rating THAT THEY DID NOT KNOW. Then you would see only profiles of people within your looks range. In other words, if you're a 6, you would see only profiles of 5s, 6s, and 7s. The software would block the sending of any pictures.

    Thus, to find someone, you would have to do some actual work. You would have to read through detailed profiles and make choices of who you wanted to interact with via private messages. Exchanging email address and phone numbers would be prohibited until you've exchanged at least 20 messages with one another. Also prohibited would be revealing your profession. You would be making a choice of whom to meet up with solely based on a detailed interaction with the other person based on who they are, what their values are, how well they communicate, etc. You would also be limited to no more than 6 people that you're communicating with, and you could only drop someone from your list of 6 AFTER you've met with them.

    This system MIGHT have some chance of working if people chose to play by the rules, but, of course, people would look for hacks or workarounds to find out people's looks or professions. And today's women are too superficial, greedy, and impatient to use such a thing. But a system designed to make people find out who a person really is, and limited in choices, and those choices limited to your actual SMV, is the only thing that would have a chance of working, and that is only IF people would actually use it. Most women would be too lazy to do the necessary work.

  4. #4

    Re: Smart video about women fed up with the dating market

    Sounds like they’re saying the INTERNET is like an infection that as it spread destroys.

    Perhaps the solution to a lot of people’s/societies problems is going internet free as crazy as it sounds. But then people will say everybody else is living in the digital world so they can’t leave. And the cycle continues…well gets worse and worse as now even 5-6 yr olds are getting smartphones to enter the digital realm. Imagine how much time they will have spent online by the time they are 40. Would you say 50% of their waking life?

  5. #5

    Re: Smart video about women fed up with the dating market

    There was a time when people put little 40 or whatever word ads in the newspaper saying single, like good conversation, blah blah blah. Those people back then probably got more action than most men nowadays would get on a dating site with millions of single people.

  6. #6

    Re: Smart video about women fed up with the dating market

    Quote Originally Posted by Edwardhaskell View Post
    There was a time when people put little 40 or whatever word ads in the newspaper saying single, like good conversation, blah blah blah. Those people back then probably got more action than most men nowadays would get on a dating site with millions of single people.
    I remember that. There was somewhat of a stigma about placing a personal ad. The thought was that if someone had to place an ad, they were some kind of loser. Then, still before the Internet, there were computer dating services where you would pay money to have them match you with someone whom you would go out with. I actually worked for one of those companies. It was a nightmare, let me tell you. It was when I first started to realize that young women have a massive advantage in dating. Even young men with great jobs struggled, though I didn't understand why at the time. This was the early 90s. Dating was already a broken mess.

    Then in the Internet's early days, finding someone online had that same stigma as personal ads did. Plus, there was the fear that you would meet up with someone and get murdered. And women already had a huge advantage then.

    So I must bust the myth that dating apps destroyed dating. Dating was already a ruined cesspool of a mess with golddiggers just trying to find rich men to use. Dating apps have just made everything much worse, and the feminist "no slut shaming" campaign has helped make it worse. Now any woman with a modicum of looks can order a fuck boy as easily as ordering a pizza. I would love to see some stats prior to the Internet and now comparing STD rates. I'd bet you anything STDs have gone way up.

    If you were once an idealist who believed that people would be virtuous and that most men could get together with a wonderful woman who treats you as an equal and as a human being, there's no way not to be horribly disappointed. Women have awful instincts and will use and abuse men unless they are seriously motivated by restraints. Those restraints used to be the need to save oneself for marriage, religion, and society's expectations.

    "Virtuous woman standards" have been changed to "slut shaming," and are now seen as a terrible thing. Well, it was a good thing. The best thing that could possibly happen to women would be for them to be once again despised if they ride the CC. "You slept with how many men? Ewwwww! You're revolting trash, don't touch me." That would be the best thing that could possibly happen to women, and it would be even better if CC behavior would once again make women social outcasts.

  7. #7
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    Re: Smart video about women fed up with the dating market

    And why do we care?...


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