Thread: How do you take care of your mental health?

Originally Posted by The Captain

When it comes to Los Angeles, I pass through it as I would a Large Intestine (as quickly as possible). On my return from 664 (Tijuana) I stopped just 2 miles south of the Los Angeles city limits (just off Interstate 5) at the Slauson Avenue cutoff to "top off" my fuel tank. This was at about midnight on a Saturday night at the local 7-11. There was a County Deputy Sheriff inside having troubles using his charge/debit card.

I paid in cash for my fuel and left.

I go through PA coal country just to avoid NYC! In your neck of the woods you'll find me doing Death Valley to to the Salton Sea just to avoid LA! I love driving for an hour at a time and not seeing another soul! Makes me realize how small a human being is and why people disappear and never seen again. How many aircraft alone have vanished without trace is a testament to the size of any wilderness (plus impacting the ground at 300 mph doesn't help much with subterfuge).

Originally Posted by Mr Wombat

Vitamin D every day. Changed my life.

I started taking it awhile back. I haven't noticed anything, so I must have been getting enough. Am still eating it though, don't want to fall short.

The cat helps a lot, I'd be lost without the little shit. Their not like dogs, but a good one will still care about you.

I apply a model similar to Maslow's Hierarchy of needs:

https://www.verywellmind.com/thmb/Fm...003668392e.png

The precise definitions at each level aren't what matter; design the hierarchy as fits for you and work upwards. Each level must be sorted before moving upwards. I don't want to repeat what others have said so the next few bits will be disparate:

Exercise: There are things you could try 4lyfeman, even with your issues in this department.. I used to be a semi-pro athlete and then, before I'd even hit 30, I became aware that I had a degenerate spinal condition; suddenly years of ignored pain made sense. I've had to make serious changes, especially when it comes to exercise. There are still things that can be done though. Research, get professional help as needed, try different things and be patient with yourself, it will take time to discover what works for you.

Self-Actualisation: The last and harder to achieve need for most I think. Firstly, decide what your ideology is, you may have to make your own. Research the works of those you consider wise. Discard what is useless and adapt what is useful to yourself. Then, ideology in tow, decide what you want from life. This goal will be easier after having done the first; you'll be building off what you have already decided.

Originally Posted by frog

The cat helps a lot, I'd be lost without the little shit. Their not like dogs, but a good one will still care about you.

Once a cat grabs your heart they have it forever. I still miss my Sammy. We loved each other until the very end. When a cat loves you it is rather special. Dog people may not understand, but after I rescued Sam from the streets, we belonged to one another.

Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.

Originally Posted by The Captain

Once a cat grabs your heart they have it forever. I still miss my Sammy. We loved each other until the very end. When a cat loves you it is rather special. Dog people may not understand, but after I rescued Sam from the streets, we belonged to one another.

Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.

Cat are different. No matter how much you hate them, there's one out there that has a personality just like yours.

Originally Posted by frog

Cat are different. No matter how much you hate them, there's one out there that has a personality just like yours.

Maybe that's why I like my neighbor's undomesticated cat, It hunts and kills all the wire chewing, nuts-in-the-carburetor, smelly piss and shit everywhere chipmunks and rodents! He leaves it up to me to do the squirrels! We kill allot of shit!

Originally Posted by TiredOfWmnSh!t

Some thoughts on things that have helped my mental health and quality of life in general. (Sorry its more of a brain dump)

Riding Motorcycles, its like meditation for me. I run a riding club and this is also a way for me to spend time with other men, productive time as we share the experience and help one-another when there are problems.

I suggest you read about Stoicism.

Stay away from politics and the news in general. It won't make you happier.

Read. I read several books a week.

I quit drinking. I used to be a closet drunk. Anytime I was home alone I was shit faced. The cycle of recovering and craving sucks so bad. Alcohol is poison. I needed some help (Naltrexone) to do this. PM me if you have a problem and you want to talk. (This invite is open to anyone)

Exercise helps me a lot but I've lived a nomadic life and its been hard to fit into my schedule. Currently working on this.

If you can have a pet, get a dog. My dog is my bestie and he does make parts of life harder but he makes most parts better.

Spend time alone. Learn to be OK with it and enjoy it. I fucking love my solitude. I don't hear a voice for the first few hours of every day.
Whenever I'm around family or a chick sleeps over I'm blown away with how much fucking useless talking there is.

Have goals and work towards them. Always be striving towards something, no matter how big or small it is. We need to struggle, fail and achieve. Nobody is having the time of their life on their way up Mt Everest but they all describe it as such after the trip.

Talk to strangers. I always feel happier when I've had a little convo with a stranger.

Be helpful. Even if its reaching for that top rack thing and handing it to an old lady/man in the grocery store.

Make money. Invest it smart. (I buy land and houses) Money hasn't made me one bit happier but when you have enough money saved that you don't have to worry about day to day expenses or losing your job, you can go buy anything you want at anytime, its very empowering. And guess what? Knowing I can is all I need, the more money I make the less I spend. When I was broke, I seemed to spend spend spend. Super weird.

Manosphere/red pill stuff is important but don't take it (or anything) too seriously. Good lessons but you can get caught up in anything.

Try to remain in the moment/fully present. This is a big one for me. Dr Dwayne Dyer has a book on Taoism thats helped me a bit, along the way. Ekhart Tole has been interesting but... IDK. Buddhism has also been interesting but as a reader I explore many topics. All contribute in some way but there's no one thing here.


Sorry for the rambling, I hope something in there helps someone.

/Tired.

Outstanding post. Only thing I'd ad is to learn to appreciate all you've learned. When I first started learning about the things we discuss here, I felt cursed and burdened. Over time however, I've learned to see it as a strength and a bit of a shield as well.

Originally Posted by mgtower

I go through PA coal country just to avoid NYC! In your neck of the woods you'll find me doing Death Valley to to the Salton Sea just to avoid LA! I love driving for an hour at a time and not seeing another soul! Makes me realize how small a human being is and why people disappear and never seen again. How many aircraft alone have vanished without trace is a testament to the size of any wilderness (plus impacting the ground at 300 mph doesn't help much with subterfuge).

I'm with mgtower on this one. I detest major metros and, now that I'm able, avoid 'em like the plague. Unfortunately, during my working years, to acquire maximum gains, I lived in major metros the entire time, so I suffered them stoically. One time, I barely got away from an attempted mugging by a taxi driver, while I was in his taxi. Crrrrrrrrrrrrrazy.

I feel safe in the suburbs than in Chicago due to all the crimes, shootings and carjackings you hear about every day.

If a cat really loves you there's nothing quite like it. The first night I had Sam He spent the night sleeping on my side. After that, it was as if we had been bonded for life.

I left town for a week trying to find work. The boy refused to sleep anywhere but on my pillow. My wife would hold the phone next to him and the boy was excited to hear my voice. When I came back to town, the Mrs. carried him to the car to meet me at the bus depot. He was overjoyed at my return and sat in my lap as we drove home.

He remained glued to me for days.

Originally Posted by Azure Nomad

I see a lot of young men gravitating toward black pill mindsets throughout the internet and what they fail to realize like Kryptic has said is that to let go of petty things. To take it further if you truly are all in with black pill concepts then you should have an abundance mindset and a mindset geared toward not fearing outcomes if nothing truly matters.

If you are still heavily invested into things or people then that means you are not really black pill. Which is fine but also recognize that you have to first have an internal dialogue with what you believe and who you are and where you are going. Where are you going long term like in ten years? And even better what are some short term goals like 1-3 years? Operate with a mindset of completing both short term and long term goals.

From there you will obtain more questions than answers. But at that point you will be asking yourself what more can I do to grow as a man? Some men reach that zenith sooner or later or look for it for their entire lives.

We can not answer that for you but mental health step 1 is accepting that you have problems that you want to solve. Talk about it, write it down and see how you can reasonable resolve these issues that makes sense to you in a way that is healthy and allows you to gain greater independence.

Mental health breakdown really is a dependence on ideas or outcomes that are often out of your control. Letting go is the hardest thing to do as a man but it can be done and should be done for your long term sanity.

I mean blackpill mindset, depending on how you define it, its somewhat amusing as they are so close yet so far from the truth.

Nihilism is supposed to be liberating, yet they are a bit gloomy about it. You can take the facts that nothing matters, objective meaning doesn't really exist, and that in a few hundred million years this planet will be engulfed by the sun and be set free by understanding this.

I mean, its probably cause everyone starts out that way, kinda sad and gloomy, and then over time, they get better and understand this. Once they understand this, they leave the forum. Once you get the message, you hang up the phone. The only people still talking are the ones who haven't gotten it yet. Its just a sampling bias really. I am sure lots of doomers will (hopefully) become a bit more enlightened and become optimistic nihilists instead of pessimistic ones.

Originally Posted by TiredOfWmnSh!t

Try to remain in the moment/fully present. This is a big one for me. Dr Dwayne Dyer has a book on Taoism thats helped me a bit, along the way. Ekhart Tole has been interesting but... IDK. Buddhism has also been interesting but as a reader I explore many topics. All contribute in some way but there's no one thing here.


Sorry for the rambling, I hope something in there helps someone.

/Tired.

Eckhart Tolle is good too. But I love Alan Watts as well as Mooji. These are 2 good Buddhist guru's. I dont like sadhguru as he is a bit inauthentic and contradictory.

Originally Posted by cisco1

Eckhart Tolle is good too. But I love Alan Watts as well as Mooji. These are 2 good Buddhist guru's. I dont like sadhguru as he is a bit inauthentic and contradictory.

Thanks - Added to my reading list.

Originally Posted by 4lyfeman

As for hobbies, I play video games. I also recently bought a kindle and started reading on it. However I've dropped it several times already and am scared of it breaking suddenly. I can't afford replacing it.

Get a case or cover for it

Originally Posted by ResidentEvil7

Because of the weight gain, I'm spending time lifting weights in the basement gym I bought last year with an old plasma TV where I watch wrestling and man movies to help with my workouts. I just wish I had a cable weight machine, because I like that better than free weights.

I'd stick to the free weights. It's well documented that free weights are better, unless you have injuries that prevent you from using them.

I don't think it's a bad thing to take stock and look at what you HAVE rather than don't have and also to compare yourself with what others are going through.

A good current example is Ukraine. These people were going about their lives and then Russia not only invades but from all reports have been brutal. Families killed, raped etc. That is huge and puts into perspective things like not enjoying your job etc.

Same with money, none of us think we have enough but then what about people who really don't have any.

I am not trying to be Saintly here, quite the opposite in a way. Just enjoy that your life isn't as shitty as some people's are. Take some time to smell the roses. Enjoy the little things.

Specialists suggest that you should keep your brain active. In this respect, I completely agree and I find various online games extremely helpful. I also like casino games that add excitement. Currently, I am into betting – I use this application https://betting-apps.co.za/topbet-login-and-register/. And what is your favorite casino game? Share please!

Get out in nature! Take up fly fishing, camping, hiking, shooting, wild mushroom hunting and foraging, etc. being in the woods or on the water are the only two things that center me in mind and soul. Get off the electronics. Start learning how to cook and get good at it. Pick up a musical instrument.

start trying some of these things and see where you find the peace you are looking for. The older I get the more I realize that PEACE is what I seek…NOT happiness. The happiness will come with the peace. I’ve been ghost since 2014… I have never been this content in my life.

I am a firm believe that men need the outdoors. It’s in our DNA