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  1. #21

    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    i went to a local bar tonight by myself for some wings…and a beer since I was in a bar. The 5 or 6 men around the bar talked and debated for about 45 minutes about football players…which wide receiver is the best…which ones would be better with a better QB…blah blah blah. They were loud and passionately debating it like it was super important. They seemed to know every player. Many men do seem to know almost complete rosters (plus colleges) which make me wonder how much time they must invest.

    In my experience most men talk about a few topics as mentioned — football is a big one. For the most part over the last 10 years I’ve zoned out on sports. Just doesn’t interest me anymore. The players come and go and play for whatever team offers the most money. It’s all just a money making business.

    Another topic men like is beer…what their favorite beers are, how much beer they can drink, what crazy things they’ve done when drinking beer…boring, IMO.

    Material possessions is probably in the top 3-4 too…their truck, boat, big tv, house, how many guns they have, etc.

    I also dislike all the alpha and beta crap that took over the internet and now real life over the last 10-15 years. Nowadays, if I hear guys (or women talking about guys) trying to talk macho or alpha I’ll purposely go the other way just to pick at their logic. For example — talking about how tough your jacked up trucks are…I’ll say I drove a Prius for 12 years and how it’s one of the best vehicles made…how cheap it was to own and how it regularly towed 2-3k lbs in my utility trailer. I want to flesh out from them some of those effectively “but it’s gay” comments, lol. That’s when I know I’ve found weak minded people.

    Give me something on human behavior, psychology, philosophy, history, religion or even paranormal or conspiracy theory. I’d rather hear something totally out of left field/borderline crazy from somebody thinking on their own than the typical beat to death topics.

  2. #22

    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Have the vast majority of the population ever talked about anything of value throughout the entirety of human history? Most conversation is banal small-talk, which is in part why I'm introverted.

  3. #23

    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by thenamelessone View Post
    Have the vast majority of the population ever talked about anything of value throughout the entirety of human history? Most conversation is banal small-talk, which is in part why I'm introverted.
    Maybe part of what separates a lot of extroverts from introverts is indeed the ability to tolerate meaningless small talk.

  4. #24

    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    As an introvert, I definitely relate better to other introverts. It seems that finding like-minded people these days is getting increasingly difficult.

    I lived in a small rural town for over 10 years. A lot of the guys there had the good-old-boy mentality. They all seemed to know each other from having worked at the same farm or factory, or they knew someone’s relative. Shit like that. A lot of their conversations revolved around work and family/domestic issues. They would joke about drinking and sports, but there was a time and a place for that. It was a college town, so a lot of them had some kind of education, which made it a bit easier to discuss things besides local events. There was always that random bunch of guys who wouldn’t say much to me. I’m a clean-cut city guy and looked vastly different from most of the local guys. There were some assholes in the group no doubt, but they were an okay bunch of guys overall, some of whom I still keep in contact with after having moved out of the area.

    Location plays a significant role in the dynamics of social relationships and communication. I moved to a much larger city in Nevada and instantly noticed the difference from the rural setting I was previously in. 9 out of 10 guys were playing the macho card up the ass. It was all designer shirts, jewelry, sports cars, and a “my shit don’t stink” expression on their faces. Forget about the topics of conversation. Most of these assholes act like they’re too busy or in a hurry to be somewhere most of the time and can’t be bothered to talk (unless they’re talking to an attractive, self-absorbed twat). Having a decent conversation anywhere is next to impossible, not that it’s any big loss with these douchebags anyway.

    Societal norms have changed drastically. Social media has been a cancer to how people relate to each other and the values that people have in life. People have changed. Most people don’t seem to have any depth anymore. Most guys can talk about some stupid shit they saw on YouTube the night before, but they can’t hold a conversation about literature, classic movies, or anything that wasn’t popular 10 minutes ago. Guys have always been chasing twat, but the rules of the game seem to have become more sinister now. Guys are overly defensive and aggressive over the smallest things and would harm you to protect their ego or image without thinking twice. I see something stupid every day it seems. It makes me appreciate my introversion all the more, relieved to be out of the game and away from the bullshit pissing contest that life has become.

    I think the problem is more general than just having to do with how guys are. It seems that people in general are moving further along on the asshole spectrum.

  5. #25
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by Unboxxed View Post
    When I was in my 20s and living in small town Wyoming, I was one of the alpha dogs in the pack I ran with. I'm not talking sexually, I mean in assertiveness, daring, making things happen.

    So I moved to big-city Phoenix, a valley of 2 million people, and I became an instant nobody. No crew around me like I had before. But I still had my energy and outspokenness. The people at work didn't know what to make of me, I think. For my part, I thought everybody around me had given up. I felt I had to motivate people to do basic things in communication and problem-solving. I was undaunted, though, and was the guy I was, (some people would whisper, "Who is that guy?") and without realizing it I developed a reputation to not try to put things over on me because I could hold my own. I learned this from a manager years later. Looking back, I see the respect I was getting was because of how I came across while I assumed it was just the way people ought to treat each other. I didn't know I was holding people off of me or anything like that. Overall, I view my time in Phoenix as unpleasant, like I derailed from Plan A in life and was living Plan B or something.

    I moved to Seattle years later, where I now live, what are we now, over 700,000 in population, and the people here generally are docile to me. They don't think they are. While I was still a working man here, I had notoriety but in a good way. I became the GoTo Guy forcing the right way into getting things done, which became the bold way, another way of being the alpha dog, I suppose.

    So, different areas have different styles of peeple, I'd say. Phoenix was a city of transplants from other geographic areas. How new is the modern Dubai? Is Dubai no different than Phoenix, full of recent transplants, causing everyone there to pull into themselves, simply using caution, just to play it safe?

    Or, ha, is there some unseen police force ready to swoop in at slightest infraction, then you disappear and wind up as lawn fertilizer like in a sci-fi movie.

    What I'm saying, Jagr, is that, like me, you may be stuck with who you are, wherever you go.
    Phoenix is on my short list of places I have considered moving to. You wouldn't recommend it?

    Living in a place where it's cold six months out of the year, I thought it might be good to live in a warmer climate.

    > I thought everybody around me had given up.

    That's interesting. Figured that the sunshine and warm/hot weather all year would perk people out. Many people get depressed around here when it starts to get cold.

  6. #26
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by Chris007 View Post
    I never liked small talk because it always came across to me as meaningless chatter. Later in life I realized that the chief reason is that I just don't give a rats ass about most peoples idiotic lives. I'm not jaded or anything, it's just that I don't want to waste my time on things that have no perceived value to me.
    I'm kinda similar when it comes to co-workers. I hope they're happy and healthy but I don't really give a fuck what they do on the weekend.

  7. #27
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by Societysucksmyass View Post
    As an introvert, I definitely relate better to other introverts. It seems that finding like-minded people these days is getting increasingly difficult.

    I lived in a small rural town for over 10 years. A lot of the guys there had the good-old-boy mentality. They all seemed to know each other from having worked at the same farm or factory, or they knew someone’s relative. Shit like that. A lot of their conversations revolved around work and family/domestic issues. They would joke about drinking and sports, but there was a time and a place for that. It was a college town, so a lot of them had some kind of education, which made it a bit easier to discuss things besides local events. There was always that random bunch of guys who wouldn’t say much to me. I’m a clean-cut city guy and looked vastly different from most of the local guys. There were some assholes in the group no doubt, but they were an okay bunch of guys overall, some of whom I still keep in contact with after having moved out of the area.

    Location plays a significant role in the dynamics of social relationships and communication. I moved to a much larger city in Nevada and instantly noticed the difference from the rural setting I was previously in. 9 out of 10 guys were playing the macho card up the ass. It was all designer shirts, jewelry, sports cars, and a “my shit don’t stink” expression on their faces. Forget about the topics of conversation. Most of these assholes act like they’re too busy or in a hurry to be somewhere most of the time and can’t be bothered to talk (unless they’re talking to an attractive, self-absorbed twat). Having a decent conversation anywhere is next to impossible, not that it’s any big loss with these douchebags anyway.

    Societal norms have changed drastically. Social media has been a cancer to how people relate to each other and the values that people have in life. People have changed. Most people don’t seem to have any depth anymore. Most guys can talk about some stupid shit they saw on YouTube the night before, but they can’t hold a conversation about literature, classic movies, or anything that wasn’t popular 10 minutes ago. Guys have always been chasing twat, but the rules of the game seem to have become more sinister now. Guys are overly defensive and aggressive over the smallest things and would harm you to protect their ego or image without thinking twice. I see something stupid every day it seems. It makes me appreciate my introversion all the more, relieved to be out of the game and away from the bullshit pissing contest that life has become.

    I think the problem is more general than just having to do with how guys are. It seems that people in general are moving further along on the asshole spectrum.
    Big City vs. Rural Town

    Which do you prefer?

    I have been more small town/rural for quite some time but have thought about moving to a big city. One draw is meeting more people or a bigger variety of people, but reading posts like this makes me reconsider.

  8. #28

    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    I see it as a decline in imagination. We have tech up the wazoo, but no one can tell a story anymore. So we keep rehashing and mangling the old ones. Women are utterly banal. They are nothing but at list of selfish demands. Men are nothing but a list of selfish wants and empty pride. Everywhere you go is now the same place. You go somewhere else and they are still just glued to their phones. The only freedom is within.

  9. #29

    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by jagrmeister View Post
    I'm in a new place (Dubai) and am using a friend-finder app to expand my social circle since I came here not knowing anyone. I meet friends mostly in other ways like events, through the people I know. But I wanted to try it because it sounds like a good idea.

    I'm amazed how 90% of other men don't know how to hold a conversation. Like they are boring to tears, say little to nothing of interest. When women used to say men are like this, I would disagree but now I wonder. Has social media, smart phones, and video/computer games turned people into complete dullards?

    I noticed this IRL to some degree. It seems today people including men have bigger ego's (in this entitlement era we live in) but have an arrested-development personality. When I meet up with people, IF there is some common interest that binds the group, like some work subject, into the same sports, etc. - there's conversation. Absent that, nothing.

    We talk about female regression but now I'm wondering if men are regressing as well.
    Is it possible maybe they just have lousy English skills?

  10. #30

    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by Brock View Post
    Big City vs. Rural Town

    Which do you prefer?

    I have been more small town/rural for quite some time but have thought about moving to a big city. One draw is meeting more people or a bigger variety of people, but reading posts like this makes me reconsider.

    I will admit that I had a better time socially in the rural setting, which is odd considering I was born and raised in a big city. At least in the rural setting I felt like people were a bit more authentic. My experience of people in the bigger city I currently live in is that a lot of them are completely caught up in themselves and their image. Men walk around like they have the loudest truck and the biggest dick and the women act like they expect you to taste their shit and ask for a second helping. It’s really pathetic. Keep in mind I live in Nevada. I think the whole casino/club element adds another layer of degeneracy to it all.

  11. #31
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by frog View Post
    This is one of the bigger reasons I'm not that social. People expect me to stand there while they go on and on and on, but if what I got to say takes more than a few seconds I watch their eyes just glaze over. They talk all day yet won't listen to anyone else.
    About mid-life, I realized I pay attention to people and pick up the clues of conversation fatigue or lack of interest in what I am saying. So, I shut up. But VERY often there is little or no reciprocity. They can babble on for hours without picking up any hints of my lack of interest. So, conversations turn into a one-way monologue. When I figured this out, I intentionally got more aggressive about extracting myself from pointless non-conversations. After I did this, numerous bores disappeared from my life. If they couldn't talk themselves out, they wanted no more contact. Good riddance to them.

    We end up becoming "not social" because we in fact have the social skills. The others often are essentially just narcissists talking about themselves. IMO real two-way conversation has always been rare, but it's getting worse in the social media era.

  12. #32
    Senior Member Chris007's Avatar
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by BeenThereDoneThat View Post
    We end up becoming "not social" because we in fact have the social skills. The others often are essentially just narcissists talking about themselves.
    This is a great observation, and it rings very true.

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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by Brock View Post
    Phoenix is on my short list of places I have considered moving to. You wouldn't recommend it?

    Living in a place where it's cold six months out of the year, I thought it might be good to live in a warmer climate.

    > I thought everybody around me had given up.

    That's interesting. Figured that the sunshine and warm/hot weather all year would perk people out. Many people get depressed around here when it starts to get cold.
    For Phoenix, think skeleton baking in the desert hot. Air conditioning 24 hours a day hot. They have tourist places that close and board up the windows during the summer because it's off season. I walk around a lot on my travels, and in Phoenix it was me and the homeless walking around, while everyone else drove their air-conditioned cars to their air-conditioned offices, then home to their air-conditioned houses. However, it is nice for a few short months in winter.

    It's a tough dilemma for someone in your shoes. It is true the big cities have more churches and groups for potential interaction with people. But in my experience living in a big city, face to face social life is going down the drain. I have been a member of numerous social groups, and most are falling apart. That 8 hours + people spend a day staring at their phones cuts into "IRL" social interaction. Young people don't want to be involved. Old people are dying off or losing interest.

    It's an epidemic of loneliness. Frequently I see people hogging the attention of store clerks. There can be 10 people standing in line, while one sad sack tells his/her life story to the cashier. And it's not just old people anymore.

  14. #34
    Senior Member stanmsl's Avatar
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by Edwardhaskell View Post
    i went to a local bar tonight by myself for some wings…and a beer since I was in a bar. The 5 or 6 men around the bar talked and debated for about 45 minutes about football players…which wide receiver is the best…which ones would be better with a better QB…blah blah blah. They were loud and passionately debating it like it was super important. They seemed to know every player. Many men do seem to know almost complete rosters (plus colleges) which make me wonder how much time they must invest..
    It's the exact same here in the UK, different sport obviously. The worst things is, that during lockdown I had visions of people making a bit more of life when it all ended. How wrong could I have been ? I have since expanded my social circle and only show my face in my home town a couple of times a month now.

    A few weeks ago I suggested to a group of friends going to a pub with great live music on about 5 miles away, the bus you catch is in the center of our town and drops off right outside the pub in question. Minimal effort required but nobody could be bothered and stayed in the usual local that had no atmosphere and about 10 people in it on Saturday night.

    I have a friend who has a good well paid job, he comes off nightshift Saturday morning, goes in the pub dinnertime after 5 hours sleep maximum. By 18:00 he is too wasted to have a conversation with when all his friends come out. He grabs a takeaway and stumbles home. This has been his routine for at least 25 years solid, I know many people who live some variation of this.

    We talk about the pitfalls of marriage and relationships but many single men are hardly living "their best life".
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by Societysucksmyass View Post
    I will admit that I had a better time socially in the rural setting, which is odd considering I was born and raised in a big city. At least in the rural setting I felt like people were a bit more authentic. My experience of people in the bigger city I currently live in is that a lot of them are completely caught up in themselves and their image. Men walk around like they have the loudest truck and the biggest dick and the women act like they expect you to taste their shit and ask for a second helping. It’s really pathetic. Keep in mind I live in Nevada. I think the whole casino/club element adds another layer of degeneracy to it all.
    That is odd as I figured a big city would be better socially. Maybe you were seen as more interesting in the rural area since you lived in the big city.

    Sounds like the people in the bigger are pretty superficial. Nevada is another place I've thought about moving to, but perhaps I should reconsider that one as well.

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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by BeenThereDoneThat View Post
    For Phoenix, think skeleton baking in the desert hot. Air conditioning 24 hours a day hot. They have tourist places that close and board up the windows during the summer because it's off season. I walk around a lot on my travels, and in Phoenix it was me and the homeless walking around, while everyone else drove their air-conditioned cars to their air-conditioned offices, then home to their air-conditioned houses. However, it is nice for a few short months in winter.
    Oh wow. Maybe it's one of those places better suited for a vacation than actually living there. I was there a couple of times in February/March (weather was great and it was fun. Guess I need to visit in July or August to get a realistic feel of the place.

    Quote Originally Posted by BeenThereDoneThat View Post
    It's a tough dilemma for someone in your shoes. It is true the big cities have more churches and groups for potential interaction with people. But in my experience living in a big city, face to face social life is going down the drain. I have been a member of numerous social groups, and most are falling apart. That 8 hours + people spend a day staring at their phones cuts into "IRL" social interaction. Young people don't want to be involved. Old people are dying off or losing interest.

    It's an epidemic of loneliness. Frequently I see people hogging the attention of store clerks. There can be 10 people standing in line, while one sad sack tells his/her life story to the cashier. And it's not just old people anymore.
    Oh wow. Thanks for that description of the way things are.
    I've lived in pretty much the same area (in the suburbs and then more of a small town/rural type setting). I've never tried a large city. When I look at my hobbies and interests though, most of them can be done from pretty much anywhere. The things that draw me to a big city (sporting events, concerts, etc) aren't things that I really attend all that much. I guess if I'm looking to move somewhere to meet new people then it's likely I'd be disappointed.

  17. #37
    Administrator jagrmeister's Avatar
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by DangZagnut View Post
    Maybe they just don't want to talk. If someone is bugging me, I'm excessively boring so they go away.

    Not everyone wants to talk to strangers.

    Also, who knows if you're some crazy leftist looking to get triggered. They have no clue.
    I'm talking about a friend-finder application where people are on it specifically to talk with other guys and make friends. No women are permitted on it. And yes I do screen out any of the gay dudes who are trying to use it for something else.

    Some of you may be wondering -- who is this Jagrmeister guy? Have a look at some of my posts from MGTOW Forums--> Jagr Archive (collection of my articles)



    Stuff I do: Box, Surf, Tennis (3.5/4.0), Downhill skiing. I lift 4x a week and have for 10 years.
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  18. #38
    Administrator jagrmeister's Avatar
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by Unboxxed View Post
    When I was in my 20s and living in small town Wyoming, I was one of the alpha dogs in the pack I ran with. I'm not talking sexually, I mean in assertiveness, daring, making things happen....
    Good account Unboxxed. There may be differences between locations but I continue to believe the driving factor is that people are on their smartphone all day and forgot how to communicate, tell jokes, or do anything but be work-slaves.

    Some of you may be wondering -- who is this Jagrmeister guy? Have a look at some of my posts from MGTOW Forums--> Jagr Archive (collection of my articles)



    Stuff I do: Box, Surf, Tennis (3.5/4.0), Downhill skiing. I lift 4x a week and have for 10 years.
    Stuff I like: Comedy shows, NBA, Reading Non-Fiction (sociology, philosophy, biographies).
    Random facts: I admire Steve Jobs. Favorite travel spots (Russia, Central America).

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    Administrator jagrmeister's Avatar
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by frog View Post
    This is one of the bigger reasons I'm not that social. People expect me to stand there while they go on and on and on, but if what I got to say takes more than a few seconds I watch their eyes just glaze over. They talk all day yet won't listen to anyone else.
    This I've noticed a great deal in the US. I believe it springs from entitlement from shitty parenting engaging in child worship and instilling selfish qualities in their kids. But you know it's funny you mention this. I have the opposite problem here in Dubai. But at one gathering, I interacted with a German guy and it's precisely as you're describing. I just ignored the dude and talked with others at the table but precisely the same idea "I can babble incessantly but will demonstrate my utter indifference when anyone else talks".

    Some of you may be wondering -- who is this Jagrmeister guy? Have a look at some of my posts from MGTOW Forums--> Jagr Archive (collection of my articles)



    Stuff I do: Box, Surf, Tennis (3.5/4.0), Downhill skiing. I lift 4x a week and have for 10 years.
    Stuff I like: Comedy shows, NBA, Reading Non-Fiction (sociology, philosophy, biographies).
    Random facts: I admire Steve Jobs. Favorite travel spots (Russia, Central America).

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    Administrator jagrmeister's Avatar
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    Re: Are all Men this socially retarded/boring?

    Quote Originally Posted by MGTOWFOREVER View Post
    I have stated this on the forums a few different times. Most men bore me. I can't stand the fake machoism.
    That's one of my pet peeves too. Guys fronting all the time. Happened in US, not here (though I have other issues as mentioned). But in the US, the typical try-hard would not make eye contact, chin up to assert superiority. Try to ignore what others were saying or dismiss it as irrelevant. Be overly intense when talking and try to use declaratives. It was this constant macho posturing that you don't know whether to laugh or what. Because of the nature of work I do, I don't encounter too many of those at work (but occasionally I do) but do so outside of work quite a bit. In my book, you can't "act important", you are important based on real qualities: like what you know, and how you are as a person.

    Some of you may be wondering -- who is this Jagrmeister guy? Have a look at some of my posts from MGTOW Forums--> Jagr Archive (collection of my articles)



    Stuff I do: Box, Surf, Tennis (3.5/4.0), Downhill skiing. I lift 4x a week and have for 10 years.
    Stuff I like: Comedy shows, NBA, Reading Non-Fiction (sociology, philosophy, biographies).
    Random facts: I admire Steve Jobs. Favorite travel spots (Russia, Central America).


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