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Thread: My introduction

  1. #1
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    My introduction

    Hi!

    First of all, a few disclaimers:

    1. I understand why introductions are necessary as an anti-troll measure, and why you would ask for the things you specifically ask for in an introduction. Of course, I will comply. But still, I have to tell you why I'm uncomfortable sharing my history and experience with women (especially as an introduction), so that you can know where I'm coming from before reading my story:

    See, I could tell you that I'm an incel looking for some contentment and peace of mind. But in a lot of people's eyes, that would immediately null and void my life experiences and anything I had to say. Because that's just how human beings are wired on a very subconscious level. Even other incels do that to each other. Or I could tell you about my experiences with women (which would be the truth, and what I'm about to do), but that can easily come of as "bragging". And on some level, maybe that's exactly what it'll be. Or maybe there's nothing to potentially brag about, which honesty would suck a little bit.

    See how this works? For a man to talk about his experiences with women is a losing proposition either way - at least if you're in the business of intellectual honesty and genuine curiousity. Because no matter the angle, no matter where he's coming from, it does play up to the idea that a man's value and the value of his words - the very relevance of his life experience - should be judged by his amount of success with women, i.e. 'gynocentrism'.

    So before I continue, let it be known that this is a mindset I firmly oppose. I don't care if you're an alpha, a beta or an omega. Whatever success - or lack thereof - anyone has had with women, it shouldn't matter. I only care about the sense with which you speak, the strength of your observations. No matter where you're coming from - through which lense you've observed the horror show that is 'gender dynamics' - your life experiences, thoughts and observations are just as valid as anyone else's.

    2. I have not shed my ego. Obviously. I probably never will, and I don't beat myself up over it either. It's an ongoing process. But that also means I'm just as susceptible to ego-investment and mental buffers as anyone else, so everything I say about "my own life", and "my experience with women" in particular, should therefore be taken with a grain of salt. Although I'm trying not to, I may exaggerate my own relevance in that regard, or hide my own weaknesses because I don't want to confront them - much less share them.

    3. I don't qualify as a "Man Going His Own Way". The reason is that I've put myself in a situation where that can't really be an option. I have a kid on the way, and must do the best out of the situation - that means raising the child together with the mother (my girlfriend), and therefore living together with her as well. I put myself in that situation out of my own free will by being careless. I wasn't fooled or coaxed, I did it to myself.

    Having said that, I'm positive about my situation. I'm actually looking forward to being a father. And with the situation being what it is, I'm glad it happened with her and not someone else. That is not to say she's a NAWALT, or that it isn't just "my turn", but she is a well-raised person who understands the importance of fatherhood.

    So whatever happens to our relationship, as long as it's nothing too crazy, I'm confident we can at least cooperate well towards the child. Although I really don't want to get screwed over in a practical sense (legally/financially), "muh feelings" is not something that worries me or that I even take seriously; 'stoicism' all the way with regards to that.

    If that disqualifies me from membership here, then so be it. I consider myself "MGTOW aware", but not an actual MGTOW. I look up to it as a life style choice, which in itself gives me a tremendous peace of mind even as I'm in a relationship.



    Relationship history / my path towards the red pill:

    I started developing a romantic interest for girls at an early age - 2nd grade of elementary school or so (this was in the 80's). Always had my eye on someone in particular, and would have heaps of "two weeks girlfriends" back then. Holding hands, kissing, all that stuff I was into. Although I wasn't an "alpha", this is probably the closest to that I've ever been. So for the sake of this introduction, I'm going to call that my "alpha phase".

    Then at the start of secondary school, I had to start wearing glasses. I had no sense of style back then - and neither did my parents - so I ended up with glasses of the "practical" variety (you know, the round ones that wrap around your ears). On top of that, I would inherit clothes from my older brother (8 years older, and we're now in the 90's). Also, I was a somewhat late bloomer when it came to puberty. Suffice to say, I was completely invisible to girls then, but still as romantically interested in them as before - if not more. I'll call this my "incel phase", and you could say my teenage depression hit me hard because of that.

    Fast forward to high school. I'll call this my "high status phase part I". Still rocking (not really) those glasses and the 80's clothes, but this was a music high school, and I've always been a competent musician. So I was enjoying the status that came with that, and had my first couple of "proper" girlfriends. The first one was the one chasing me, but with the second one I was the one doing the chasing (major difference in dynamics).

    Now, med school. I'll call that my "high status phase part II", but it really was a mixed bag. Although I did enjoy the status of going to med school, I had also become a major stoner by then, which had the opposite effect. So although I didn't enjoy status among my fellow med students, it did have an effect on girls I didn't go to school with.

    So I met an Asian-American girl (I'm European btw), a backpacker, who moved there to stay with me. This was the first girl I cohabitated with, and I was absolutely in love with her. She was like no girl I had known before. I'm from a rural part of Europe, you see, so the girls I had met until then were pretty dull in my eyes. But this one had tried all kinds of psychedelics that were still on my to-do-list, and she had a dark sense of humour I had only found amongst other guys until then. So in me eyes, she was the coolest girl ever.

    But oh boy, was I a blue pilled mess, a raving beta (I've always been a beta at heart). I remember staying up at nights just to have time to myself (gaming mainly), because I would spend all day with her, doing stuff she wanted to do. So I ended up not going to school, and eventually I flunked out of med school entirely by the third year. That's ultimately on me though, not her. We were both young, and doing what was in our nature to do: Her getting her hands on all the time and attention she could possibly extract from me, and me being all too willing to give it up, being a simp.

    Had I been red pilled back then, things would probably have looked a bit different (for one, I would have called the whole thing off when she admitted to sucking another guy's cock right before moving there). I have no regrets though, it was a valuable experience looking back. Besides, life's too short for regrets.

    Obviously, she left me when I flunked out of med school. Again, I don't blame her. Women like winners, not losers - just like men like "younger", not "older". We don't choose what attracts us and what doesn't. But it was a dark time I had to go through then. Dropping out of school, getting dumped and to top it all off: My dog died as well. I seriously considered suicide (which my pathetic self of course made sure to tell her - yeah, not my proudest moment).

    Then I got a job for about a year while trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my life. Dated a single mom during that period. Ended up dumping her - not because I was even remotely red pilled, but because I was still simping for the ex. Dodged a bullet there though. Looking back, she was extremely entitled and displayed a wide variety of red flags. She tried to pull the "I'm pregnant" - card, but conveniently had a miscarriage when I wouldn't budge. Still don't know exactly what happened there, and I don't really care. Maybe she had a miscarriage, maybe she had an abortion, maybe she wasn't pregnant at all. Probably the latter.

    Then I went to teacher's school - music pedagogy to be specific. Again, being in a music environment gave me some things for free, but by then I was kind of jaded when it came to women. I was back in a rural place, and again I found the women to be kind of dull. Looking back, they were probably "better women" though than the big city crazies I had a thing for back then. I just didn't want to having to defend things like loving LSD and mushrooms and the like. Rural women tend to behave like they were born menopausal - it's just too much of the "homely" stuff with the exact same need for keeping you under control as the crazies.

    Then I worked as a music teacher and musician for a few years. Not doing great on the woman-front again, and I was back to sort of being invisible (except for a few fatties at gigs). This is when I read "The Rational Male" for the first time, which had a profound impact on my view of reality. And for that I will always be grateful to Rollo Tomassi - even though I disagree with him these days on his subtle MGTOW shaming (which I find a perfectly sensible application of Red Pill awareness). Doesn't matter, I have nothing but respect for the man.

    I still slipped though. Ended up falling for the "it's time to do what everyone else does" - trap. Clearly, I wasn't red pilled enough (can you ever be?), so I ended up cohabitating with a complete psycho simply because she loved to take it up the ass and then her mouth. Yeah, my bad 100% for being a filthy pig. One false domestic violence accusation later, I was out of there. Now homeless due to a restraining order. Thankfully, the case got thrown out before even reaching court, and it didn't cost me more than about 700 USD in lawyer fees etc (my country isn't as insane as USA and Canada yet).

    It was during the time with her that I discovered MGTOW (via Reddit). I consumed the work of people like Barbarossa and Stardusk like it was candy, and when weeding out the memes and the shit posts on Reddit (which are fun, don't get me wrong), I found the MGTOW community to be the most honest and cerebral part of the manosphere. Although I was already familiar with the terminology and theoretical foundation from The Red Pill community, I took an instant liking to these guys taking bachelorhood as seriously as they did. Just being exposed to the ideas expressed there, had an immediate positive impact on my mental health - like a load of my chest, and a lot of the ideas were already familiar to me through my experience with psychedelics (ego death, the reality behind reality etc).

    Although The Red Pill community has done a lot of good for me, and I would never shit on it for that reason, or in any way imply that I have anything figured out that they haven't, I guess the MGTOW community offered me that last little bit that the Red Pill community couldn't: bachelorhood as a equally tempting proposition, shedding an ego that revolves around women, letting go of gynocentrism and to truly live for oneself.

    Part about my interests and who I am coming up...

  2. #2
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    Re: My introduction

    I could tell you that I'm an incel
    I don't qualify as a "Man Going His Own Way".
    I consider myself "MGTOW aware", but not an actual MGTOW.
    then, after more Intro:

    If that disqualifies me from membership here, then so be it.
    I think you already knew.

    You can communicate with us in the Nonmember Questions and Opposing Views sub-forum.

    Thank you.

    Account closed.
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

    The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.
    - Henry David Thoreau

    There are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary, and those who don't.

    Suitable for bookmarking: www.fakehatecrimes.org and www.breitbart.com/tag/hate-crime-hoax and register-her.net

  3. #3
    Senior Member Opaque's Avatar
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    Re: My introduction

    So whatever happens to our relationship, as long as it's nothing too crazy, I'm confident we can at least cooperate well towards the child. Although I really don't want to get screwed over in a practical sense (legally/financially), "muh feelings" is not something that worries me or that I even take seriously; 'stoicism' all the way with regards to that.

    If that disqualifies me from membership here, then so be it. I consider myself "MGTOW aware", but not an actual MGTOW. I look up to it as a life style choice, which in itself gives me a tremendous peace of mind even as I'm in a relationship.
    You, sir, are not a MGTOW and with that kind of mentality towards life, you will never grasp the "spirit of MGTOW''.

    Reading you post, it sounds like you are looking forward to getting divorce raped, and disposed of by your soon to be wife. And it seems that you are excited by the prospect of it!

    What is even more audacious and pernicious is that you come on here and redefine the meaning of MGTOW and you say you are "MGTOW aware". The members on this forum, by virtue of being here know what it means to be a bonafide MGTOW. They gained this knowing, by experience, debate, questions, answers, reflections.

    They didn't just break in the door and proclaim it!
    A mother cannot raise a boy to be a man, not because he needs a father figure; but because she favours team vagina over her own son.

    Tradcon women are the most manipulative of all kinds of women, because they infect you with false hope.
    Radfems are your best friend, because they hate you and verbalise it - that's honesty!

    The red pill rage is a process which takes many many years - so be kind and patient with yourself; you will overcome it!

  4. #4
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    Re: My introduction

    Quote Originally Posted by Opaque View Post
    Reading you post, it sounds like you are looking forward to getting divorce raped, and disposed of by your soon to be wife. And it seems that you are excited by the prospect of it!
    Very interesting that you say that, because that was what I was thinking about him for even coming here. How he knew, how he knew, that he would be rejected from this site but still he plunged right in, eyes wide open in saying he was not MGTOW. Like he was asking for rejection. All that wasted effort he made. It was strange. I thought this.

    I thought about saying something. I was going to go through his story to see if self-destruction was maybe a pattern to point out to him, but I didn't bother.

    However, you saw it, too, in the content of his story.

    A pattern? Dude likes to sabotage himself?
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

    The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.
    - Henry David Thoreau

    There are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary, and those who don't.

    Suitable for bookmarking: www.fakehatecrimes.org and www.breitbart.com/tag/hate-crime-hoax and register-her.net

  5. #5
    Senior Member mgtower's Avatar
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    Re: My introduction

    My turn!

    As men, we all got the shitty end of the stick, the only difference? MGTOW will not lick it, we stick it back where it came from.

  6. #6
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    Re: My introduction

    Quote Originally Posted by mgtower View Post
    My turn!
    Hmm... I don't follow this. Beating a dead horse, er donkey? Usually that means somebody cannot let go of a topic, but I can't make that fit here. Sorry.
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

    The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.
    - Henry David Thoreau

    There are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary, and those who don't.

    Suitable for bookmarking: www.fakehatecrimes.org and www.breitbart.com/tag/hate-crime-hoax and register-her.net

  7. #7
    Administrator Unboxxed's Avatar
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    Re: My introduction

    Quote Originally Posted by Unboxxed View Post
    Hmm... I don't follow this. Beating a dead horse, er donkey? Usually that means somebody cannot let go of a topic, but I can't make that fit here. Sorry.
    Ha, I think I can now derive applicability, mgtower, as the OP seemingly cannot let go of it:

    https://www.goingyourownway.com/mgto...-denial-13435/

    and if he is the guy with the new website, yeah boy is he thirsty to talk:

    https://www.goingyourownway.com/mgto...cussion-13434/
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

    The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.
    - Henry David Thoreau

    There are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary, and those who don't.

    Suitable for bookmarking: www.fakehatecrimes.org and www.breitbart.com/tag/hate-crime-hoax and register-her.net


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