Thread: Skiving at Work (Empty Labor)

Originally Posted by Bonobo Protocol

I've then seen those who are great socialites get accolades even though they don't perform all that well.

Many years ago at my employer, I was all work, no schmooze. My company needed a special project done so they picked me and another fellow, a known schmoozer to management, and gave us a pair of specially-equipped computer terminals in a workgroup to use for this project that was not in our own group, and located on a different floor as well. We were told to do a little work on the project, then go back to our regular floor/desks to do our regular jobs, then go back to the project. We could go back and forth between the floors, between the project work and our normal work, as we decided was necessary to keep things moving at both tasks. We were trusted to be autonomous about it.

I was almost always working on the project but my partner was rarely there with me. I found out later that he was not at his regular desk either. He was out goofing off and visiting with his girlfriend on yet another floor. So, when he wasn't at the project, everybody around us in the project area assumed he was back at his normal desk. When he wasn't at his normal desk, everybody there assumed he was working on the project. He was in neither place for most of the time. He played everybody while I did most of the project work itself.

Later, when the project was near over, our director had a meeting with our normal workgroup where at the end of the presentation the director gave a congratulations to Mr. Schmoozer for his fine work on the project. My name was not mentioned. My peers who were in that meeting later said their jaws dropped at this.

Why wasn't I at this meeting? I was on the project floor, working the project, of course. No one told me of this meeting.

I was a sucker in those days. I thought that not tooting my own horn was noble. Perhaps so, but I take public credit nowadays.

Originally Posted by Unboxxed

Many years ago at my employer, I was all work, no schmooze. My company needed a special project done so they picked me and another fellow, a known schmoozer to management, and gave us a pair of specially-equipped computer terminals in a workgroup to use for this project that was not in our own group, and located on a different floor as well. We were told to do a little work on the project, then go back to our regular floor/desks to do our regular jobs, then go back to the project. We could go back and forth between the floors, between the project work and our normal work, as we decided was necessary to keep things moving at both tasks. We were trusted to be autonomous about it.

I was almost always working on the project but my partner was rarely there with me. I found out later that he was not at his regular desk either. He was out goofing off and visiting with his girlfriend on yet another floor. So, when he wasn't at the project, everybody around us in the project area assumed he was back at his normal desk. When he wasn't at his normal desk, everybody there assumed he was working on the project. He was in neither place for most of the time. He played everybody while I did most of the project work itself.

Later, when the project was near over, our director had a meeting with our normal workgroup where at the end of the presentation the director gave a congratulations to Mr. Schmoozer for his fine work on the project. My name was not mentioned. My peers who were in that meeting later said their jaws dropped at this.

Why wasn't I at this meeting? I was on the project floor, working the project, of course. No one told me of this meeting.

I was a sucker in those days. I thought that not tooting my own horn was noble. Perhaps so, but I take public credit nowadays.

I'll bet my cosmic stars that if the project was a failure your name would have stood, alone...

Originally Posted by Unboxxed

I was almost always working on the project but my partner was rarely there with me. I found out later that he was not at his regular desk either. He was out goofing off and visiting with his girlfriend on yet another floor. So, when he wasn't at the project, everybody around us in the project area assumed he was back at his normal desk. When he wasn't at his normal desk, everybody there assumed he was working on the project. He was in neither place for most of the time. He played everybody while I did most of the project work itself.

In certain jobs where the relation of work done (input) to results (output) is unclear, it is usually best to be a "middle of the road" employee. Being perceived as being valuable and productive is much more important than actually being those things. It also helps if people tend to like you.

There are many people at my job where they are known skivers and when something goes wrong, it's their fault because "they're lazy and not doing their job". Then there are those who come across as "hard-chargers" and they are some of the biggest slouches when it comes to production. BUT, they are perceived as great employees by management so they can get away with a lot.

It has been my experience that the one who is polite and flies under the radar will have a much easier time than those who are obvious lazy employees.

It has been my experience that the one who is polite and flies under the radar will have a much easier time than those who are obvious lazy employees.

You should ALWAYS pretend to be busy. Never let your managers see you doing nothing, always make sure you are either on the phone, even a pretend call, or closely looking at your laptop; you can even pretend to be taking new orders from customers, and then when the manager asks about these orders, just tell them that the customer changed their minds and they are amending them for next week.

If you can even get away with tinkering with the sales figures so you look like the best salesman, then do so. If you job pays for overtime, work at medium speed until 5pm, then start getting busy.

Maximise your downtime, remote working has been a blessing. Work that starts at 9, should start at 11, finishes at 5? move that to 3. and so on. Focus only on the VERY important tasks and if your colleagues ask you for this or that trivial shit (which they always do) just say you are extremely busy and on the phone with the customer.

Manager calls you? Don't reposed immediately. Wait for 5 - 10 min and then call back saying the customer was speaking with you. You were taking new orders.

Is there a project that is impossible to do? Then keep telling your manager that you have contacted so and so and that you are still waiting for feedback. Don't ever show all your cards immediately.

NEVER ALLOW ANYONE TO PUSH YOU OFF KILTER, MAKE SURE YOU HAVE YOUR ROUTINES SET UP SO THAT YOU HAVE A PERFECT ANSWER TO ANY STUPID TIMEWASTER SCUMBAG.