Thread: Why I became a ghost.

One day, I experienced a catharsis:

I was not blessed with excellent vision and wore glasses since I was a child.
I hated wearing glasses. I felt inferior.

Everyone else made fun of me because my vision was imperfect, or so I surmised.
They didn't need optical crutches to see clearly, but I did. I felt weakened somehow.

Then I purchased my first set of contact lenses. I felt empowered because now I looked
just like everyone else who didn't bear my astigmatism. Like a push up bra for a woman
with sagging breasts. Makeup, perfume, nice things, once again I appeared to have perfect vision.
It was a lie.

After many expensive years of supporting my vanity, I took the bra off of my girlfriend
and realized something very important. Her tits were not what they seemed to be. I would have
liked them better without my contact lenses.

We fucked in a lackluster way and disposed of each other almost immediately.
We were both fakes.

I am not my glasses, nor am I disabled because my body is weak in one area.
She is not her sagging tits either. Fair is fair. Truth is truth. Lies are lies and honesty is honesty.

Decades later, I met a very pretty blind woman. A few weeks later she moved in with a total thug.
As I parked next to their borrowed truck I whispered under my breath, "She is so beautiful she doesn't even
know it." Her face turned toward my barely audible words and I knew she heard me say that, inside my running car
and under my breath.

She was not disabled at all when it came to sound; only sight.
I was no longer disabled because of my sight because I could wield sound.
Nature upholds balance. When one thing is diminished, another value increases.

Everyone is competing for something. While they do so, they are not working together for something better
than what they have. Having is very popular and being is irrelevant. Thinking is nearly forbidden.

I stopped wearing contact lenses or worrying much about my appearance for the most part.
Tonight I'm typing this nonsense because I put my contact lenses in wrong, then correctly and
remembered that I am not this mere flesh and blood body, aging slowly and dying one moment at a time.

When my body dies, it won't matter. It's a rental car, and when I turn it in, the tank will be full.
I will have done everything I sought to accomplish and more then I'll be ready to move on.

I became a ghost the day I realized that vanity, fame, fortune, possessions, and ruling others
were distractions and trivia. That was the day I wanted more than anything to rule myself first and
others last, if at all.

I hope this clarifies what I intend to do with the rest of my life.
I hope any of you reading this can find the same intent and life freely, and fully.

LP

Ghosting is wonderful when you let go of external expectations and let internal expectations rise.

Originally Posted by LastPriory

That was the day I wanted more than anything to rule myself first and
others last, if at all.

Beautifully put LP.