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  1. #1

    Angry Should I ghost my online friends?

    I have an online group of friends whom I consider to be my pals. Not only they stopped gaming with me they also make fun of me. Ever since they found out that I am MGTOW they fixated on it, calling me an incel.

    A friend of theirs added me, unsolicited, and she started the chat with "so you're the MGTOW guy huh?". I got creeped out and thought someone doxxed me but it turned out my "friends" air my dirty laundry to God knows who.

    Ditching them will cost me deleting my whole account and starting over, but I think it's worth it.

    What's your advice? How to know what's appropriate and what's not appropriate to share with friends? I should have never let them know anything beyond my gaming username.
    Last edited by frompaintogain; November 26, 2021 at 9:23 PM.

  2. #2
    Senior Member mgtower's Avatar
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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Smoke'em like cheap cigar!


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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by frompaintogain View Post
    But now they neither chat with me or game. So not only that they stop gaming with me, they make fun of me for things I used to do in the past that I have since overcome.
    Sorry if this sounds harsh, but it seems like they have already made the choice for you.

    Friends come and they go and people change, or maybe you realise that they weren’t the people you thought they were in the first place.

    As for what you shouldn’t relate to people – nothing that you don’t want the whole world to know about you, even to the closest of friends. Especially about MGTOW. As I said, friends come and go in life. Whilst losing a friend or even a group of them can be difficult, it’s just the way life is.

    From what you’ve written it sounds like it’s time to move on.

  4. #4
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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    At first I thought you were going to ghost them because you just felt like it. Then I read they betrayed you and aren't accepting of who you are. So yeah I would ghost them and not look back. The best part of online anything is that you really do get to walk away and especially if they don't know where you live, what you look like etc There is no looking back.

  5. #5

    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    If you're gonna discuss MGTOW, you'll be planting the bombs on the bridge you're about to blow up or both of you will be jumping off together into the deep end of redpill topics etc.

    If you want to talk to online friends about Mgtow you need to make sure they aren't BP simp's, or be more confident and call them out for being blue-pilled sheep and prepared to write-them off as a lost cause for being too far down the rabbit hole of societal brainwashing.
    In general don't bother discussing it unless it's brought up, even then, better off playing ignorant and asking them to explain and describe it instead of flagging yourself as someone familiar with the topic, should you still want to keep the "friendship" going incase they aren't receptive of the ideas.

    Online friends usually start at the beginning of a match and end when you turn off the game - you'd better off getting some IRL one's to hang out with, easier to talk face to face & gauge people's personalities that way.

  6. #6

    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by JustWannaRetireFk View Post
    Online friends usually start at the beginning of a match and end when you turn off the game.
    Damn, this is a strong sentence. I'll keep it in mind. Thank you!

  7. #7
    Administrator Unboxxed's Avatar
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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    If you do not know their real names, they are not friends.

    If you have never met them in person, they are not friends just because they are nice to you and interact nicely with you.

    Even in person, they are not friends just because they are nice to you and interact nicely with you.

    They are acquaintances, not friends. Big difference.

    The word "friend" is misused, when the word "acquaintance" would apply.

    They never said you were a friend. You did that.

    Friendship is earned, not assigned to people, and that takes time and investment on both sides.

    You never confide in an acquaintance unless you expect them to not keep your confidence. They are not invested in you and so they have nothing to lose.

    Was it facebook that started that "Friend" gimmick? I remember thinking what a disservice it was to young people and others who have not already learned the hard way what you have now witnessed.

    Why doesn't this culture teach young people there's a difference between friends and acquaintances? It would prevent a lot of problems.

    I should have never let them know anything beyond my gaming username.
    Exactly.

    Since you offered it, I'd say to discontinue your online account and open a new one, under a different username, and this time do not trust acquaintances as if they are your friends. Do not tell anyone that you are the other account. If you run onto these online people under your new username, do not tell them who you are or that you know anything about them. Just learn your lesson moving forward.
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

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    Senior Member MGTOWFOREVER's Avatar
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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Just block them. Why would you delete your account? Is it because of what some imbeciles think? Screw that. Never care what anyone thinks. People think they can walk all over you if they think you care what they think.

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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?



    Should I ghost my online friends?

    Yes. You should. Without any hesitation.

    The moment they start making fun of you because of your lifestyle choices and when they start calling you names like incel, it's time to drop them like a toilet seat and flush them out of your life.

    There are millions of gamers online. Though not a gamer myself, it must be wonderful to create a whole new online personality with a fresh new group of people from anywhere in the world without revealing anything about you.

    By the way, if anyone calls you an incel, you can call them a cuck or cuckold.

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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    she started the chat with "so you're the MGTOW guy huh?".
    Proper response: Yeah, I'm the one who found Freedom.

  11. #11

    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    There's the old saying, too, that the first rule of MGTOW is that you don't talk about MGTOW. Don't identify yourself as MGTOW, because the label has been tarnished by the SJW left and is now associated with "toxicity." If you tell people you're MGTOW, you're just asking for trouble.

    Don't take whatever they say personally, because 1) they don't know you, and 2) they obviously don't have your best interests at heart. As Unboxxed and others said, they are not your friends. They don't know who you are, as a person. They have no idea. You've interacted with them in a limited way over a plastic box. They aren't your friends. They never were. A friend is someone who knows you and accepts you for who you are.

    Anyone who doesn't accept you for who you are, you don't need in your life anyway. Eject. Walk away at the first sign of disrespect. Dismiss their opinions as worthless. Once more: they don't know you, so their opinions cannot be valid. Their behavior also announces to you that they are cruddy people you don't want around you. They will just drag you down.

  12. #12

    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by Eddie Haskell View Post
    There's the old saying, too, that the first rule of MGTOW is that you don't talk about MGTOW. Don't identify yourself as MGTOW, because the label has been tarnished by the SJW left and is now associated with "toxicity." If you tell people you're MGTOW, you're just asking for trouble.

    Don't take whatever they say personally, because 1) they don't know you, and 2) they obviously don't have your best interests at heart. As Unboxxed and others said, they are not your friends. They don't know who you are, as a person. They have no idea. You've interacted with them in a limited way over a plastic box. They aren't your friends. They never were. A friend is someone who knows you and accepts you for who you are.

    Anyone who doesn't accept you for who you are, you don't need in your life anyway. Eject. Walk away at the first sign of disrespect. Dismiss their opinions as worthless. Once more: they don't know you, so their opinions cannot be valid. Their behavior also announces to you that they are cruddy people you don't want around you. They will just drag you down.
    I've taken an oath to never bring up MGTOW again, because stereotypes dictate how people will view you from then on, and you'll needlessly drag yourself into interrogations and having to constantly explain yourself which is something that you really don't have to do.

    It's like you stopped being their long time pal but became a mascot of stereotypes that they have to constantly nitpick on...

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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    @frompaintogain

    I see you have edited your O.P. and that’s fine.

    But from what you had posted previously I thought maybe you also knew at least some of them in real life and maybe this is where you confided in them.

    Did I misunderstand or were you considering online acquaintances to be true friends?

    If so, this was your mistake, one made by many and one you won’t make again. Ditch them immediately.

    As others have said you can always re-join using a different handle.

    We live and learn.

  14. #14

    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jackoff View Post
    @frompaintogain

    I see you have edited your O.P. and that’s fine.

    But from what you had posted previously I thought maybe you also knew at least some of them in real life and maybe this is where you confided in them.

    Did I misunderstand or were you considering acquaintances, especially those we make online (as Unboxxed so rightly phrases it) to be true friends?

    If so, this was your mistake, one made by many and one you won’t make again. Ditch them immediately.

    As others have said you can always re-join using a different handle.

    We live and learn.
    They were online friends, and sorry for the constant edits. I am trying to make my post as vague as possible as to not get found again from them.


    I am trying to avoid specifying exact details so they can't find me again...

    But yeah, they were online friends that I knew for over ten years. I grew up with them, but finding out they air my dirty laundry to people I don't know behind my back and giving them my handle to add and harass me got me fed up with them. Not only they stopped gaming with me, they became an annoyance.
    Last edited by frompaintogain; November 23, 2021 at 4:28 PM.

  15. #15
    Senior Member mgtower's Avatar
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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by frompaintogain View Post
    They were online friends, and sorry for the constant edits. I am trying to make my post as vague as possible as to not get found again from them.


    I am trying to avoid specifying exact details so they can't find me again...

    But yeah, they were online friends that I knew for over ten years. I grew up with them, but they are too SJW to put up with being friends with a person who doesn't want to risk his assets by marrying a woman...
    It's not the marriage to a woman that's the risk, it's the legal jeopardy to signing a marriage contact, and now that marriage is for gays, trannies, lesbians, and women, we'll be seeing the fruits of signing that legal binding contract in due time and on it's own merit!

    No matter who marries what, it's a legal binding contract that subjects a person to marriage rape, depending on who put in the most and and got the least, often with the legal system walking away with EVERYTHING, leaving both parties with nothing to show for years of labor and mountains of effort!

    A marriage license has become a certificate of state ownership over two individuals to be collected upon separation.

    There's no greater freedom than being independent from state ownership! They abuse the fuck out of everything they own!
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  16. #16
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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by frompaintogain View Post
    sorry for the constant edits. I am trying to make my post as vague as possible as to not get found again from them.
    Hey man,

    No biggie on changing your posts. I do it all the time. Just look at the post you quoted me on and the post I changed it to.

    The change I made was because I re-read it and thought: “No, this sounds better.”

    The change I made was only a minute or so later, but you caught me mid-change and quoted me on it.

    Am I bothered? Am I hell!

    The only problem I’d have is if a member did a total u-turn on what he originally said and tried to profess a completely different viewpoint from the original post.

    Neither you nor I did that, so… not a problem!

  17. #17
    Administrator Unboxxed's Avatar
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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by frompaintogain View Post
    because stereotypes dictate how people will view you from then on,
    Anyone may find this interesting that older gay people, men and women, who were young at a time before gay was accepted, therefore closeted, sought to become superlative at their job because, if they ever were found out or suspected, they would already be known for being an excellent and knowledgeable worker and this fact might insulate them from wholesale rejection. "I will make you like me before you can hate me."
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  18. #18

    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by frompaintogain View Post

    A friend of theirs added me, unsolicited, and she started the chat with "so you're the MGTOW guy huh?".
    The other responses have covered the general question well, so I'll add a comment about this piece. The potential problem here I think of as "false alignment". Men and women do it, but women are born masters of the craft. You're expressing something different than the rest of the boring herd, which makes them curious. So they'll act interested and sympathetic, asking about your ideas and point of view. It's easy to be encouraged by this interest and fall into a trap. They'll waste a lot of your time just talking about something they don't actually live. Talk is cheap.

    I've found if you truly "go your own way" there are a lot of people who will try to latch on, as you've demonstrated more strength than they possess. It's a hazard of real growth.

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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by Unboxxed View Post
    Anyone may find this interesting that older gay people, men and women, who were young at a time before gay was accepted, therefore closeted, sought to become superlative at their job because, if they ever were found out or suspected, they would already be known for being an excellent and knowledgeable worker and this fact might insulate them from wholesale rejection. "I will make you like me before you can hate me."
    An interesting observation.

    Back in the 1990’s I worked with an openly gay dude. A nice enough guy that got on well with all of us, at least in day-to-day activities and staff nights out etc.

    It took a few years though to understand what he was at.

    There was an underlying animosity there.

    Not from us to him – as far as I know no-one ostracised or criticised him in any way, we genuinely liked him – but from him to us was a different story.

    He was the type to tell tales to the bosses about others. As I say it took a few years to catch on to this because unless it’s something VERY serious it’s a nod and a wink and an “I understand” from the boss. It was never anything that anyone was accused of.

    But, as you say, he established himself. Not just with his co-workers – he did this very well, but also at the cost of his co-workers.

    I like to think that my bosses at the time seen through this shyte for what it was, but once doubt is implanted it tends to remain.

    So yes, he did try to make himself seen as a “knowledgeable and intelligent worker” and if he had kept to his job that would be a fair judgement.

    But he had to go a step above and beyond; he had to promote himself as being above his co-workers.

    So, back to your point Unboxxed of gays becoming seen as being superlative at their jobs, I have to ask at whose expense?

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    Re: Should I ghost my online friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by Unboxxed View Post
    Anyone may find this interesting that older gay people, men and women, who were young at a time before gay was accepted, therefore closeted, sought to become superlative at their job because, if they ever were found out or suspected, they would already be known for being an excellent and knowledgeable worker and this fact might insulate them from wholesale rejection. "I will make you like me before you can hate me."
    Before drug testing at work became common, potheads did the same thing. At least some of us did. Figured if we were valuable to the place, they'd be more likely to keep us around. Did it work? Sometimes, though it was hard to tell. It wasn't something you talked about.

    A friend worked the local ski area. She goes "they never test the snow cat driver, but hit me over and over, what's up with that?" The snow cat driver did a good job and they liked him. That's what's up with that. They knew my pal was clean too, that was another reason she got tested a lot.
    Last edited by frog; November 24, 2021 at 10:23 AM.
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