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  1. #1
    Super Moderator Mr Wombat's Avatar
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    Ngbebe, the non-swimmer.

    One upon a time - not too long ago, really - a happy tribe of people lived on an archipelago of islands in a wide, muddy river. They mostly lived by collecting the river cucumbers from the floor of the muddy river. They had no boats or means to make them, so as you can imagine swimming was all-important to them. They swam from islet to islet, they swam and dived for the cucumbers. Their sports, thier culture was all about swimming. They lionised and admired those who could swim furthest, fastest, for the longest.

    Everybody swam. Everybody except for Ngtebe, because Ngtebe had been born with no legs.

    Well, actually, that's not true. Ngtebe did swim, of course. He swam quite well - better than you or I. But not nearly so well as the rest of his tribe. He knew that it was because he had no legs, but he never really *got* it. He'd rationalize: after all, he could certainly float pretty well. He could breaststroke, backstroke, all the usual. And, as I said, the water was muddy. He never really saw people kick to swim. He knew they did, but that's as far as it went.

    Ngtebe mailed away for "how to swim" courses. These never did much good, really, because they covered fine points of swimming that were only useful for people who had all their limbs. He practised the breathing techniques, he practised counting his strokes. But, no real success.

    Occasionally, in a flash of insight, he kinda sorta really would get it. But - hope springs eternal. He always wanted to be a swimmer mostly as good as most others. Because it was so important to his whole culture, he came to think that it was some failure of commitment, some character flaw in himself. Practise makes perfect after all. Maybe he's just not practising enough. Maybe, to some degree, he is a bad and weak person.

    Ngtebe grew to adulthood and into his middle age. Never really swimming all that well. Never really understanding why. He kinda came to terms with it, in a way moved on. Then on day a stranger came to the river. A talent scout for a sporting team. A swimming team. He took a team of six to the big city, and they brought a few family along - Ngtebe among them. And there, in the crystal clear waters of a swimming pool, he saw for the first time how swimmers used their legs to propel themselves through the water. Finally saw it. Finally truly understood that he had never really had a chance.

    Was he angry? Enraged? Did he curse the heavens? No. As I said, he had kinda moved on. If anything, seeing with his own eyes just how important having legs was to swimming finally gave him a little peace.

    ---

    Dave is tall. Dave is ok looking. Dave is blonde. Dave is, if not buff, fit. Tradesman. Most of all, as I mentioned, Dave is tall.

    Me, I'm short. My whole family runs to fat - it's not just me. And I have always had a sedentary job. Oh sure, oh sure, if I worked out two hours a day for a year and watched my diet and stopped drinking, the skinnyfat would get fixed. It's just a mountainous commitment, that's all. The naturally buff people with active jobs don't see what the big deal is - after all, they do that stuff any way. But I'm just not built like that, physically or mentally. Never have been, never will be.

    Last Tuesday I was out in a group with Dave. The barmaid looked directly at him, said "is there anything I can do to make you more … comfortable?". Joking, but "ha ha, only serious" joking. If Dave didn't have a wife and kids who he loved, if he was DTF, they absolutely would have hooked up.

    And I realised that that, for Dave, is what life is like. That's what it's always been like. Dave doesn't need to "neg", or to "approach indirectly", or establish "kino". Dave is perhaps puzzled by why so many guys complain about how hard it is to get a girl. As far as he's concerned, pussy simply falls out of the sky, and that's just the way it is.

    If you have trouble getting laid at all, forget every PUA book and website you have ever read. Forget everything you have ever heard or seen with the word "seduction: in the title. Most of all, realize that every PUA guru who told you that your physical appearance isn't important was lying to you. The only thing that matters is being tall and buff. It's 99%. The only advice that matters is lift heavy things, watch your diet, and put lifts in your shoes.

    That's all there is to it. Everything else is lies.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Zoidberg's Avatar
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    Re: Ngbebe, the non-swimmer.

    Very good post. People don’t want to be realistic, they’d rather be lied to. Everything is so ass backwards that even accepting your limitations brands you as a pessimist, a negative person, whereas the “I can achieve anything I want” magical thinking wins you cheers.

  3. #3
    Senior Member mgtower's Avatar
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    Re: Ngbebe, the non-swimmer.

    In battle, Dave's the first one to take a round in the head, Fuck being Dave! (something I learned from a short WWII vet that toured Italy on the way to Rome.)

  4. #4
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    Re: Ngbebe, the non-swimmer.

    Looking back, you'd think the women of my small town had the guys portioned out before anyone ever teamed up. I, it would appear, was slated for a fat one, a dumb one, or maybe a combo of the two. I wanted a skinny one with glasses, who was a little smarter than most of her sisters. Don't you hate it when that happens? I came close, and made a few friends who I have to this day, but in the end even a girl next door type was out of my league. Oh well, it did more to keep me off the plantation than anything else I can think of. How's your high standards working out now ladies?
    Every day I make the world a little bit worse.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Azure Nomad's Avatar
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    Re: Ngbebe, the non-swimmer.

    Some PUAs are honest that you have to put in so much work to achieve similar results as most other men. But at that point you have to run game daily and basically adopt it as part of your life. That might be too much of a sacrifice for most men when it would be better served pursuing their passions and hobbies instead. Game is helpful outside of the mating arena but using game exclusively for the mating arena is not for all men.

    Appearance matters in everything you do...job interviews, solving a client/customer problem, negotiating a bill, court of law, etc. That is why old school PUA's practice peacocking so much. This is because peacocking is designed for a man to stand out. Especially true for a man if they are not naturally tall or good looking.

    My disadvantage is that I am not at an ideal height or make six figures. But since I have been interacting with customers for 20+ years my ability to read social nuances and calibrate is pretty good when combined with game. So, I can maneuver most social settings and the dating women above and beyond what most men can do.

    But even then in the end I realize that I would have to put in more work. Game is working hard for a little payoff. Now, how important that payoff is to you as a man is only decided upon by each man alone.

    Sometimes the time invested is better in something else as time is the most valuable commodity.


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