DanLimitless
Banned

Part 7:

But that is not true. It was not my fault and it is not your fault. The only things we are guilty of is: We were too naive to believe that a woman could be completely void of any emotions.

What are your thoughts?

All the best wishes.

GK

Part 6:

And I think, THIS is the real problem: We do not want to accept the possibility, that there are women like that out there. And we are ashamed to accept, that we have been naive and stupid and that a woman played us. I was that naive and she played me like I was a ten year old. The idea, that this woman was in fact cold, emotionsless and calculating, is the exact opposite of everthing we hoped for at the beginning of that relationship. Thius is one of the reasons, why that is so hard to accept. I think, a part of us, doesn´t want to accept that reality andjust wishes, that this was just a big misunderstanding and if only WE would have done something different, acted different, maybe passed their shit-tests, those women would really love us. I had those thoughts.

Part 5:

I realized that everything she ever told me was a lie....she was just playing the role of the "soul-mate" and loving woman. Those narcissists know exactly what you need and what you want. They know your weaknesses and they know how to attract you. In fact, they sense men who are a bit naive (just like I was!) and who can be played easily.

This realiziation was as painfull as the thought that I would never be together with her again. It was so painful, because I had to accept, that she was just lying to me. As simple as that. I guess, a big part of our problem is that we are almost incapable to accepth, that a woman might just lie to you. And lie to you big time. About everything. That thought is so frightening and seems so insane, that we don´t want to accept it. I mean, why should a woman lie to you all the time?

Because that is what those narcisissists do. This is their REAL nature!

Part 4:

I knew that she cheated on her ex-husband with at least 2 guys. And she didn´t feel guilty at all. It then dawned on me, that this would also have been my fate, if I would have stayed together with her. She would probably have kept me around just like a pet....for amusement or to boost her ego...and fuck other guys, while still keeping contact with me.

It was a very slow process...like I said...it took me 2 years. And like small drops that fill a cup, very slowly, I started to see a new detail every week....sometimes every day. I would think about one situation but suddenly I would see it from a different perspective. And I slowly realized that the picture I had in my head at the beginning of our relationship was in fact an illusion. This was also the time, when I started reading about narcissists.

Part 3:

After I ended the relationship with her, it took me very long to get her out of my head. I would say, about 2 years, until I wasn´t cinstantly thinking about her all the time. During that first 2 years, I read all her messages and mails and I imagined, being together with her again. This was when I discovered pickup. (Yes, I discovered that very late.) And when I read all that stuff about "being alpha", I thought that it was my fault that she hated me. Because I wasn´t alpha enough.

And of course, at the end of our realtionship, she always criticized me, telling me more or less directly, that I was not a good enough man. To weak, to attached and that there was nothing I could do to change that. I was a hopeless case in her eyes. It took me 2 years of cinstantly reapeating every moment with her in my mind, to understand what was really going on. There were signs everywhere, even at the beginning of our relationship.

Part 2:

The sex was one big factor that I missed. Not the only one, but a big one. Not only was it wild and playfull, I also felt a strong connection. In my comment in your thread I wrote that it was porn-star quality sex. And that is true. You could have videotaped it and put in online. (I don´t want to offend you with all those details but I want to get across, what an impact that woman had on me.)

But even when we didn´t have sex, I had a great time with her. Just talking to her when we were talking a walk, looking at her face. She was pure and innocent, sometimes like a child....curious and playfull but at the same time a very sensual woman. I really thought that this is the best woman in the world.

Ok, this seems to work...

Now, to answer your message:

I have been where you have been. When I ended my relationship with that toxic woman, on one hand I was glad that the mental torture was finally over On the other hand, there were all those memories. I would remember allthe nice things she said, sepecailly in the beginning. And those things she said were in total contrast of her actions at the end of our relationship.

In the beginning she was talking about how happy she was that she found someone like me. That I was special and that she thinks about me all the time. We would text each other via messenger almost every night and she was very sweet. And all the flirting took me to high heaven. At that time, this was the best relatinship I ever had with a woman. I felt that we were so close. We had the same kind of humor, and the sex was amazing. The best sex in my life!

to be continued...

Hi Dan,

I have used the private message tool here only once or twice. So let me test, if I can reply to your message.