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  1. #21
    Senior Member John Deer's Avatar
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    Thanks for letting us know Mikediver.
    I'm a little speechless.

  2. #22
    Senior Member Alik Sakharov's Avatar
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    Quote Originally Posted by John Deer View Post
    Thanks for letting us know Mikediver.
    I'm a little speechless.
    Here on the forum you just do not feel someones age . And some shit happens regardless of age .

    Im speechless myself if im honest .
    You cant keep a player down!
    Dont hate him , hate your fuking bullshit game !

  3. #23
    Senior Member Mystic Rodent's Avatar
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    Quote Originally Posted by John Deer View Post
    Thanks for letting us know Mikediver.
    I'm a little speechless.
    My feelings exactly. Originally, I wanted to write something brave and consoling. But all my words sounded false as hell before this terrible reality. In the end, all I could do was ask Mikediver to tell us more about his state of mind. At least, some of the commentators have managed to express sentiments both positive and heartfelt.
    Last edited by Mystic Rodent; January 1, 2018 at 10:42 AM.

  4. #24
    Senior Member Canis's Avatar
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    Sorry to hear about your ALS, Mikediver, my father was stricken with that disease so I know what you will be going through. Your contribution to this community has been invaluable.
    A creeping police state never ceases.
    It's always about the money. - A Truism
    "A man's got to know his limitations." - Dirty Harry
    A man can be himself only so long as he is alone, and if he does not love solitude, he will not love freedom, for it is only when he is alone that he is really free.
    -Arthur Schopenhauer

  5. #25
    Senior Member Alik Sakharov's Avatar
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    Quote Originally Posted by Aintdealingwithyoshit View Post
    My parents are raging commies, I'd take psychos over that any day
    Nice people
    You cant keep a player down!
    Dont hate him , hate your fuking bullshit game !

  6. #26
    Senior Member Unboxxed's Avatar
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    Mikediver, I too am sorry to hear of your diagnosis. I am not the greatest for stuff to say at these times but I do enjoy reading your posts here in this forum.
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

    Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.
    - Henry David Thoreau

    You're better than any man you outlive.
    - me

    There are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary, and those who don't.

  7. #27
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    It took awhile for it to sink in just what your looking at Mikediver. Am trying to follow your wish's, no doubt feeling bad wont help. Still, its tough to think your not being hard done, however good your life was before.
    There's no "I" in team, but there is a "U" in cunt.

  8. #28

    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    Quote Originally Posted by Mystic Rodent View Post
    If it’s not too private, I would like to ask if you have any immediate plans while you are still able to get about. Do you plan to travel somewhere? Is there anything you have not done, which you would still like to do?

    Also, has the prospect of dying changed your outlook in some fundamental way. You already said how important it is to enjoy the present—to “do it now”. To this, I fully agree. But are there things—besides financial considerations—that once seemed important which you now consider insignificant? Or have you come to value something which once seemed of little consequence?

    Forgive my curiosity, if it seems inappropriate. But I ask this because I do not wish to waste the remainder of my life dwelling upon issues and preoccupations of no importance. Rather, it would be better to find what is real and essential—to live in a way which is entirely true to our nature while there is still time.
    I have a few limitations already that have excluded a bucket list item, or two. I just got back from a week in Mexico, which was great, as I missed a week of weather below -20 degrees. I am intending to travel to Siam Reap and see Ankhor Wat. While there I may visit Thailand again, as it has been a decade since I was there. I also intend to hit the Philippines, Dominican Republic, and Jamaica again. I won't be doing any scuba however. And sky diving has been barred as well. No more hang gliding, skiing, or wind surfing either. And I won't get to try kite surfing, but it still looks amazing. I still want to be in Paris for my birthday, Bastille Day, July 14, but that may not be possible. The problem now is making it all happen while I can still move. I won't have a better estimate of the rate of progression until they observe me for about 6 months; which may be a significant portion of the mobile time left to me. The doc said the shortest time from onset of frank symptoms to repertory failure he had personally observed in his practice was 1 month. So I beat that already. Then the doc said median time is 3 to 5 years, but about 10% of his patients last 10 to 15 years. Then he dropped the bomb by adding, "What surprised me is when I talked with that 10% they uniformly said they wished it had been the 3 to 5 years." He then added, "What ever you want to do, do it quickly."

    My boss called me a few days after I notified him via email of my condition and intentions to go on long term disability. He said don't worry about work. I replied that I stopped worrying about work about 1 second after my doctor gave me the news, and didn't intend to start worrying about work ever again. I have a few loose ends that I will clean up, which may take a month or two. I am doing that only to not leave good friends I have worked with for years holding a bag of shit. But there is a lot of truth in the saying that no one on their death bed regretted not spending more time at work.

    There is one insight that this has produced that comes somewhat unexpectedly; death has no fear attached to it. I expected that to be the worst. I had been told on the occasion of a few surgeries to have my affairs in order, so maybe it has lost its power through repetition. On the other hand, I am finding that what my combat veteran friends had told me is true. They said going into combat you didn't fear death, but rather being horribly wounded. In my case, the fear, and it is significant, is not of the inevitable end, but of the long lingering helplessness that will precede it. Death means all your problems are over. Slowly becoming more paralyzed each day is another kettle of fish. I have discussed the Smith and Wesson retirement plan with my wife. She is a good Catholic, as opposed to my lapsed Catholic, so she said she was dead set against that. By the time I would want to exercise that option I would need help to carry it out, so it is a no go. She is a nursing assistant, and student nurse, who once worked in a nursing home, so she says she will never put me in one. I have nursed a dying spouse with a degenerative illness through to the end, and I can state with authority that she does not know what she is in for.
    Last edited by Mikediver; January 8, 2018 at 4:31 PM.

  9. #29
    Senior Member Mystic Rodent's Avatar
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    If you are beyond the fear of death, then you certainly possess more courage than I. However, I agree that it’s the manner of your death which seems particularly terrible. Ultimately, I believe it should be your decision—and nobody else’s—whether you wish to endure such a prolonged decline.

    Personally, I would never advise anyone—even if asked directly—about what to do in such a case. At most, I would try to help them reach a decision themselves—a decision they believe is for the best. If your wife is a devout Catholic, and believes that we must submit to God’s will until the end, then she only has the right to apply such beliefs to herself—not to anyone else. Maybe in her religious imagination, she thinks there is something serene and pious about applying a sponge to your forehead, as you lie there inert and helpless. But, as you said, the reality is likely to be much worse.

    Even though I hardly know you, Mikediver, I have to admit that I was strongly affected by your announcement last week. And while there may be no cure for this neurological disease, at least you deserve people with whom you can honestly discuss your condition and the options available—without empty platitudes or medical euphemisms.
    Last edited by Mystic Rodent; January 9, 2018 at 12:42 AM.

  10. #30
    Senior Member Canis's Avatar
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    Quote Originally Posted by Mikediver View Post
    I have nursed a dying spouse with a degenerative illness through to the end, and I can state with authority that she does not know what she is in for.
    I can sympathize 100% on that.
    A creeping police state never ceases.
    It's always about the money. - A Truism
    "A man's got to know his limitations." - Dirty Harry
    A man can be himself only so long as he is alone, and if he does not love solitude, he will not love freedom, for it is only when he is alone that he is really free.
    -Arthur Schopenhauer

  11. #31
    Senior Member johnjrambo's Avatar
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    Quote Originally Posted by Mikediver View Post
    There is one insight that this has produced that comes somewhat unexpectedly; death has no fear attached to it.
    Mikediver: I am very sorry to hear about your condition. Your courage in facing your condition is most admirable. Please keep us posted. God Bless.
    Live for nothing or die for something. - John J. Rambo

  12. #32
    Senior Member Alik Sakharov's Avatar
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    Re: reasoin for lack of postings

    Mike , its up only to you the Smith&Wesson way out . Its beautiful if im honest . When you feel that this is the end .

    Its not death we fear , its suffering . Because nobody knows what death is but we do know what suffering is .

    And when its suffering with no hope ...
    You cant keep a player down!
    Dont hate him , hate your fuking bullshit game !


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