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  1. #1

    If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    ….I'd win the Indy 500

    The strange world of post-divorce dating as a lonely single mother_国际_蛋蛋赞

    Alice Judge-Talbot married her university sweetheart at 23 and had two children, before their happily-ever after crumbled and she found herself a divorced single mother on the dating scene.

    Here, she shares an exclusive extract from her new
    book
    'The Back-Up Plan'...
    As a married person, I always enjoyed meeting new people and discovering new things, so I reckoned my dating life should be no different.

    I expected glittering conversation over bottles of wine, interesting individuals who would change my perspective on life and love, and I figured that as an approaching-30 mum of two with only two evenings off a fortnight my spare time was precious: I didn’t want to spend it with men who didn’t fit my idea of perfection – or, at least, who didn’t get close to it.

    So focused was I in my quest for the perfect man that I decided to draw up a list of things I wanted in one. My thought was that, if they didn’t tick off at least half of the things on my list, then they probably weren’t going to be the one for me.

    I mean, if methodical, precise and ambitious worked for me at work, why wouldn’t it apply to my love life, too?

    Thinking hard, I drew up 18 points...

    The strange world of post-divorce dating as a lonely single mother
    Alice dated everyone from CEOs to comedians
    1. Intelligent, or at least well-educated.

    2. Tall, preferably taller than 6 foot.

    3. Older than me, probably between the ages of 32 and 40.

    4. Doesn’t live at home with his parents.

    5. Lives near me.

    6. Likes music, but not bad music.

    7. Has a challenging career that he loves and is passionate about.

    8. Likes fancy food and to be cooked for. And cheeseburgers.

    9. Respects and encourages my career.

    10. Likes children, maybe has some – but doesn’t advertise them to the weirdos stalking their profile.

    11. Has a great sense of humour (by which I mean ‘laughs at my jokes’).

    12. Hot (duh).

    13. Plays some sort of sport or at least goes to the gym.

    14. Is fairly cultured, or at least likes to pretend to be.

    15. Looks good in a suit.

    16. Looks good out of a suit.

    17. Understands the value of a nice pair of
    shoes
    .

    18. Believes in chivalry.

    And so I set about my dating game. I went out with investment bankers, entrepreneurs, CEOs, 25-year-olds (I KNOW), journalists, comedians, marketing executives, academics . . . you name them, I’ve dated them (probably). I sat through endless hours of strangers regaling me with stories of their ‘colourful’ lives (I’ll be the judge of that, pal).

    I drank red wine in at least four different counties and in front of 16 different open fires, and the only reason I didn’t start a blog about all these awful dates was because my mum told me it would have been mean.

    It’s amazing how sterile and calculated the process started to feel. I’d meet someone and immediately assess them for the points I was looking for. If they didn’t fit? Game over.

    Men were desperate to settle down with a woman who’d cook for them and massage their egos. Lonely as I was, I just wasn’t up for that

    In the course of my dating I met many 30 and 40-somethings who were just desperate to settle down with a woman who’d happily cook for them and massage their egos for the rest of their lives and, I have to tell you, as lonely as I was I just wasn’t quite down for that.

    To be honest, I had my own ego to take care of and there really wasn’t going to be time to look after anyone else’s. I started to understand my single girlfriends’ wails when they’d come to me complaining about how they couldn’t find a boyfriend. Granted, the dates seemed to be easy to come by, it was just the quality of them that was a bit dubious.

    Really, I just wanted to meet someone with whom I’d share a bit of chemistry and perhaps some interests and hobbies. When I first became single I hadn’t thought that was a huge ask but, as I got deeper into my experiences of dating, I started to feel more and more envious of the 18-year-old me who’d met her perfect match in the most innocent of ways.

    I understood that I was an adult now, a mother, and had different thresholds and expectations when it came to the opposite sex, but why was this finding-a-man thing so freaking hard? I was a good person: where was my Prince Charming, Mark II?
    Choose your own mid-life crisis. Mine will not be a sports car, the red head in accounting, or sports betting.

  2. #2

    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    A store has just opened in New York City that offered free husbands. When women go to choose a husband, they have to follow the instructions at the entrance:

    “You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are 6 floors to choose from. You may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you CANNOT go back down except to exit the building!

    So, a woman goes to the store to find a husband. On the 1st floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs

    The 2nd floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

    The 3rd floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids and are extremely Good Looking.

    “Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the 4th floor and sign reads:
    Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.

    “Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims. “I can hardly stand it!” Still, she goes to the 5th floor and sign reads:
    Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, help with Housework and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

    She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the 6th floor and the Sign reads:
    Floor 6 - You are visitor 71,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that you are impossible to please.
    Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

    To avoid gender bias charges, the store’s owner opened a Wife Store just across the street.

    The 1st first floor has wives that love sex.

    The 2nd floor has wives that love sex and have money.

    The 3rd through 6th floors have never been visited....
    Choose your own mid-life crisis. Mine will not be a sports car, the red head in accounting, or sports betting.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Alik Sakharov's Avatar
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    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    Im not sure if someone is not making this shit up .

    Women are dumb but my hope always was that not this hopelessly dumb .




    PS. Her usual secretary career i had it better in my late teens , babe .

    The only hope that she is not floppy fattish .
    You cant keep a player down!
    Dont hate him , hate your fuking bullshit game !

  4. #4
    Super Moderator Mr Wombat's Avatar
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    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    Original article here https://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/se...single-mother/

    It would be a amazing if we hadn't seen it so often before. What a pity there is no place to post comments.

    …, before their happily-ever after crumbled and she found herself a divorced single mother on the dating scene.
    Yeah, it was this thing that just kinda happened. Divorce is a natural disaster, an act of God, not something that people choose to do. Kinda like fucking.

    I expected glittering conversation over bottles of wine, interesting individuals who would change my perspective on life and love
    In order to have glittering conversations, you have to be interested in some topic to have that conversation about. Notice here the feminine preoccupation with form over content, process over result.

    And as for having her perspective on life and love changed … it's that's exactly what's happening now?

    And we come to The List. There's always a The List. And one of the more telling things about women in general is that all their The Lists are pretty much identical. No point going over the obvious. The best hamsterization, IMO, was:

    8. Likes fancy food and to be cooked for. And cheeseburgers.
    So, which is it to be, you silly cow with impossible requirements?

    I met many 30 and 40-somethings who were just desperate to settle down with a woman who’d happily cook for them and massage their egos for the rest of their lives and, I have to tell you, as lonely as I was I just wasn’t quite down for that. To be honest, I had my own ego to take care of and there really wasn’t going to be time to look after anyone else’s.
    All that these men want, all they want, is someone who isn't a bitch. Someone with the primeval feminine virtue of kindness.

    Really, I just wanted to meet someone with whom I’d share a bit of chemistry and perhaps some interests and hobbies.
    And there we have it. She's in the market for a fuck-buddy, nothing more. What a terrible shame that all the good fuck-buddies can do better.

    Notice the picture of her on the telegraph site. Isn't what she's wearing just awful? Pale blue top with some lace and a faux leopardskin jacket? WTF? I'm not even gay, and I can tell that it's bad. And can you see any curves at all? This woman has no tits. No tits, and no hips. Where her belt sits makes her look like a dude.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Alik Sakharov's Avatar
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    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Wombat View Post
    Original article here https://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/se...single-mother/

    It would be a amazing if we hadn't seen it so often before. What a pity there is no place to post comments.


    Yeah, it was this thing that just kinda happened. Divorce is a natural disaster, an act of God, not something that people choose to do. Kinda like fucking.


    In order to have glittering conversations, you have to be interested in some topic to have that conversation about. Notice here the feminine preoccupation with form over content, process over result.

    And as for having her perspective on life and love changed … it's that's exactly what's happening now?

    And we come to The List. There's always a The List. And one of the more telling things about women in general is that all their The Lists are pretty much identical. No point going over the obvious. The best hamsterization, IMO, was:


    So, which is it to be, you silly cow with impossible requirements?


    All that these men want, all they want, is someone who isn't a bitch. Someone with the primeval feminine virtue of kindness.


    And there we have it. She's in the market for a fuck-buddy, nothing more. What a terrible shame that all the good fuck-buddies can do better.

    Notice the picture of her on the telegraph site. Isn't what she's wearing just awful? Pale blue top with some lace and a faux leopardskin jacket? WTF? I'm not even gay, and I can tell that it's bad. And can you see any curves at all? This woman has no tits. No tits, and no hips. Where her belt sits makes her look like a dude.
    LOLLLL i laughed when you started analyzing her outfit i was like " no, dude, no ..." and then " ahhh ok " .
    You cant keep a player down!
    Dont hate him , hate your fuking bullshit game !

  6. #6
    Senior Member Alik Sakharov's Avatar
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    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    I didnt see her picture at first . Of course she can be picky a little bit . But her juggling CEOs and footballers is just a fruit of her very unoriginal imagination .

    She is just an ordinary girl that is not ass hole ugly .

    I also sometimes say " i would do better for half the pay " when i watch soccerball but everybody does that while watching womens` regional league
    You cant keep a player down!
    Dont hate him , hate your fuking bullshit game !

  7. #7
    Senior Member Aintdealingwithyoshit's Avatar
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    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    Plain Jane with nothing to offer besides another man's crotchspawn has an endless list of demands. Okay.
    Solution for the rapefugee crisis https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uTYkcnJdDio
    Politicians? Oh, you mean ​lamppost ornaments!

  8. #8

    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    In her other articles, she was talking about, post-divorce, going back to the sex life of her early twenties.

    Translation of what she is saying: I am riding the cock carousel until I find someone who is a beta cuck provider on the outside, but an alpha male Chad on the outside.


    What you should hear:
    "Yes, you CAN afford a brand new sports car in perfect condition.
    BUT ...let me convince you that you need to buy a 10 year old mini-van
    - with lots of miles of on it,
    - that has a piquant aroma of diapers, juice boxes, and Snackables that a gallon of Febreeze and a pound of baking soda cannot get out,
    - that if you shined a black light on the interior it would look like Jackson Pollock had thrown a mayonnaise filled grenade into it,
    - and that a CSI team could find the DNA of enough men to fill an early 1980s San Francisco bath house.

    But that's not all....you only get to ride the mini van 4 days of the month! And the mini-van comes with two broken motorcycles that you must maintain but someone else will ride."
    Last edited by sam luis obispo; July 9, 2018 at 8:40 PM.
    Choose your own mid-life crisis. Mine will not be a sports car, the red head in accounting, or sports betting.

  9. #9

    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    And she is flacking T-shirts, too.
    Choose your own mid-life crisis. Mine will not be a sports car, the red head in accounting, or sports betting.

  10. #10

    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    https://theprivateman.wordpress.com/...housand-words/

    Yep....Eve had the Garden of Eden and THE alpha male (the very first man, the perfect man, hand made by God himself!) and she still had to sneak off and screw around with the Snake on the side.

    Choose your own mid-life crisis. Mine will not be a sports car, the red head in accounting, or sports betting.

  11. #11

    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    It's all about her. The only way to make a relationship work with this woman, is to take this advice.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u3Asm0885XE
    Choose your own mid-life crisis. Mine will not be a sports car, the red head in accounting, or sports betting.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Azure Nomad's Avatar
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    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    She argues that the dating process was formulaic but she does nothing to change this. Worse, the reason the men she is dating assume she is housewife material is because that is all she has to offer. She then goes on to describe how her innocence at a younger age had her perfect matches in the dating world. The reason for this is that younger women are not obsessed with obtaining resources or alpha chad D. But younger women are starting to discover their dating potential and the longer it takes for them to realize this the more happier they seem to be in a LTR. I always have figured this to be true when men and women marry their high school sweethearts but it is even more true when women do this.

  13. #13
    Senior Member Don Keyknob's Avatar
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    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    Mr Wombat is spot on again. 'The List'. There is ALWAYS a list. Since writing was first invented, there has never been a single list written by a woman of what they can provide for a prospective partner. It's all about and ONLY about what that prospective partner can do for them.

    I've seen these lists before. They are always the same, bar a point or two here and there. The men described on these lists do not exist in the first place. Even if they did, these men would be in the absolute top percentile of potential suitors. In other words, they would have options. Lots and lots of options. Poor old Alice has yet to work out that the man she wants and demands, can get one of these:



    instead of someone like her demanding little single mother ass:



    Take your pick, gentlemen. You have somehow succeeded in passing her endless list of entitled requirements. Now...do you want Miss Tits McSpectacles for a couple of months of fun....or will you claim Alice - as your lifelong prize*???

    (* Kids (not yours, someone else's) also included)


    Attached Images Attached Images
    Last edited by Don Keyknob; July 8, 2018 at 4:46 PM.

  14. #14

    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Don Keyknob View Post
    Mr Wombat is spot on again. 'The List'. There is ALWAYS a list. Since writing was first invented, there has never been a single list written by a woman of what they can provide for a prospective partner. It's all about and ONLY about what that prospective partner can do for them.

    I've seen these lists before. They are always the same, bar a point or two here and there. The men described on these lists do not exist in the first place. Even if they did, these men would be in the absolute top percentile of potential suitors. In other words, they would have options. Lots and lots of options. Poor old Alice has yet to work out that the man she wants and demands, can get one of these:



    instead of someone like her demanding little single mother ass:



    Take your pick, gentlemen. You have somehow succeeded in passing her endless list of entitled requirements. Now...do you want Miss Tits McSpectacles for a couple of months of fun....or will you claim Alice - as your lifelong prize*???

    (* Kids (not yours, someone else's) also included)


    Leasing the brand new sports car? Or taking on a life-time sentence with the temperamental, high mileage mini-van?
    Choose your own mid-life crisis. Mine will not be a sports car, the red head in accounting, or sports betting.

  15. #15
    Senior Member Alik Sakharov's Avatar
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    Re: If we could power my car with this hamster wheel.....

    Quote Originally Posted by sam luis obispo View Post
    It's all about her. The only way to make a relationship work with this woman, is to take this advice.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u3Asm0885XE
    LOLLLLL i lost it at when he said " bouquet " LOL

    Now im googling whether he was ever married ... LOL he was for 20 years , goshh ...
    You cant keep a player down!
    Dont hate him , hate your fuking bullshit game !


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