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  1. #1
    Senior Member JaydenJazz's Avatar
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    The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    For the entirety of yesterday I felt empty. A good friend of mine who was a fairly noticeable internet personality committed suicide and his body was found yesterday after he was reported missing last weekend. Before his demise, for the last 8 months he has exhibited signs of mental illness as the pressure of trying to keep up with the times of social media was taking a toll on him. He was an energetic, happy soul...he would be the unofficial hype man of various pop culture moments, of course his biggest one being a Nintendo fan when YouTube gave a shit about the gaming community back then. On that one October day he just snapped, his personality got erratic and in a protest to YouTube's (admittedly bullshit) policies, he uploaded a bunch of porn on his account which caused it to get terminated. Dude just hit the million mark the month before and all of a sudden, erased. As time passed, all of the pieces were starting to come into place and he was under the influence of many episodes of depression, mainly due to being a social media figure for so long. It came to a point that it overcame him, his last video was a moment of reflection and an apology to those he wronged, it definitely had that vibe of "last rites" all over the vid.

    Social media in it's own can be a blessing and a curse. I find technology awesome in it's own aspects. I've never been able to get a girlfriend around my way so the internet filled that void for me and I've had about 4 decent relationships from girls over New Orleans, Cincinnati, London and Cozumel respectively. 2 of them ended mutually, the other 2 were ghastly but this isn't about my past dating life. I'm saying that sometimes, we just need time to disconnect. Go offline for a day or two, get acquainted with life and go places you've always dreamed of going but never had the opportunity before or devote that time to a hobby or a passion you want to accomplish. It's too easy to get consumed into the online world, even more so for women than men. It's easy for women to get attention which is why they reach a plateau of success in a short time. It would take a woman mere weeks or months to get big if she wanted to but for a guy, it would take a year minimum or even so most likely which puts pressure on them to work harder for that attention and that's what got my fallen friend hooked. Not for nothing he was successful on being the entertaining personality he strived to be, but it's proven that it's harder to stay on top of the mountain than the journey it takes getting there. Dudes would get pressed for attention while on the offhand, women get an abundance of it, they become stuck-up and narcissistic, leading them to lose the ability to tell reality from virtuality, which leads them to become bitches if their real life doesn't match the attention they get online and even so they're picky with it (hence the whole 80-20 rule)

    I'm not trying to make this into a post of "Men have become easily vulnerable" or "Women lack compassion" because social media affects everyone in a universal perspective. It just varies from person to person but the overall purpose is the same. My friend let the pressure of social media get to him and it drove him to take his own life. It also didn't help that his fanbase was pretty damn toxic because of his manic, animated personality, but that's all that it was, a persona because outside into the real world, he was cool, calm and collected. Somewhere along the way, the lines got blurred and his personalities became one and the same. When you're feeling that you're at that tipping point, that's when it's best to bow out. I know us MGTOW have no issue with that because we're survivors at heart and we know when something becomes too much to bear (which is why most of y'all aren't throwing your hat back in the marriage ring again) but there's no shame in disconnecting. Always put your self and your health, whether it be physical or mental first.

  2. #2
    Administrator Unboxxed's Avatar
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    Re: The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    Please accept my condolences at the loss of your good friend. I have generally assumed that a person with a large online following is susceptible to pressures that result from the (obligations of) attention. I agree with you that it is wise to unplug from online and, in fact, to avoid making the online reality the dominant experience in one's mind.
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

    The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.
    - Henry David Thoreau

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  3. #3

    Re: The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    I'm very sorry to hear that. Wastebook was instrumental in my "downfall" so to speak, from mildly successful office-drone to dead man on a beach. I wish there was some way I could include a happy ending for you. Wastebook has done some good things for me, I'll surely admit it. But there was a time when I was so depressed I would spend over 5 hours a day on there, once again chasing the likes and shares. It starts out small, like all obsessions, and eventually this fun new thing that you enjoyed so much comes to own you.

  4. #4
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    Re: The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    It don't sound like there was much that you or the rest his friends could do. I hope nobody's blaming themselves.


    Maybe I'm missing out, but I'll never sign up. Back when this stuff was new, a friend did a search. Found I was a real estate guy, a minister, a retired cop, ran a kids summer camp, and was a child molester. A busy guy eh? Lucky for me I'm none a these things.
    Every day I make the world a little bit worse.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Insidious_Sid's Avatar
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    Re: The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    My condolences for the loss of your friend as well. Becoming an online presence would most certainly be a very stressful thing. Audiences are extremely fickle, and it's getting easier and easier to post something Verboten and get eliminated. It's BS really, but these people own the platforms and their PC status is very important. It's part of every corporation's mission statement now - talk about equality and inclusion and zero tolerance for discrimination and hate. Discrimination is disagreeing with someone and hate is just doubling down on your beliefs. Even if what you believe is as certain as gravity, death or taxes.

    As for females, I would posit that attractive women get lots of followers simply because of the sheer number of simps who follow good looking women around social media. My ex wife is always complaining that her idiot boyfriend follows women on social media solely based on their looks. I've seen this in men's Facebook profiles as well - all "HAWT" looking avatars - women from trade shows, bars, strip clubs - anywhere where they use attractive women to bring in the boys. We all know an attractive woman with 5,000 friends on Facebook, 95% married guys.

    The thing I like best about MGTOW is the DGAF attitude that I am able to have. You can't have an attitude like that in the blue-pill world. The #1 rule is blue pill land is that you HAVE to GAF. You can't have given up. You HAVE to subject yourself to the judgement and scrutiny and fickle nature of others. You HAVE to face and accept more rejection than acceptance. Well, MGTOW says fuck that, to all that. The trouble with most social media is that it is entrenched in blue-pill philosophy. It's Neo-Liberal. It's PC. It's equal and inclusive. If your opinions don't align with social just boiler plate, SOME turd somewhere is going to complain about you to the thought police. Not really a world I want to be part of. I've seen the sorts of people who are out there separating the winners from the losers and I gotta say, you can't get more ironic than that.

    In any case, it sounds like you have a significant amount of your existence tied up in online relationships. Which is fine. This site, for example, is my main and really only social group. Why would I need anything else? I got a few hundred regular guys who are as MGTOW AF and tell great jokes. But, my point is that by connecting to this site, I am able to further DISCONNECT from the blue-pill world. I like your ideas about connecting with one's humanity - visiting places YOU want to see, doing things outdoors YOU want to do. But, there is a vast difference between that and immersing ones self in the blue-pill bullsh1t.

    I would not panic about being "too connected" - if your connections are positive ones that make your stronger, make you FEEL connected, and give you positive energy back, then those connections are as valid and important as "real" ones. Hell, I think I know some guys on here better than my own siblings for god's sake. If a person's social life is largely online and they only unplug for outdoor activities or travel, that's not as crazy as it sounds. The reality is that this species, now exposed to a digital virtual self, is destined to continue to evade physical realities and try to upload consciousness into a digital environment. The extent to which that consciousness will be a collective one remains to be seen. I'd probably throw myself in the recycle bin before I would stay connected to the hive mind for very long...

    In any case, here's hoping you will go through a natural grieving process and not get dragged down too much. The signs of dangerous depression are there... normally I can tell my mental state by the kinds of things I seek out online. When I start looking at the darker corners of the interwebs, it's usually a time to press on the brake pedal... and do some yardwork or something.
    - Feminism is Cancer.
    - Where have all the good men gone? Away. Far far away... from you.
    - NAWALT? Maybe, but EWALT means Russian Roulette is a much safer bet...

  6. #6
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    Re: The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    I would like to add my condolences at the loss of your friend.

    As someone who has suffered from deep depression I'd just like to say it's only too easy to lose perspective on life.

    While I have gotten over the worst of it, depression is very like an addiction in so far as once you have been there you're never quite the same again.

    These days when I feel the world is getting too much I have absolutely no problem with disconnecting from the world - turn off my phone, don't go online, even turn off my doorbell.

    But I must say since finding you all here and just knowing that there are people out there who I have something in common with has lifted my spirits in ways that I just never expected.

    The grieving process is different for all of us and can be long and painful. Just remember that you have friends here.

  7. #7
    Senior Member ChauvinistPig's Avatar
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    Re: The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    I'm sorry for your loss, man. I lost a friend that way too. I still miss him.

    So many people are addicted to it, by design.
    Microsoft SUCKS! http://www.microsoftsucks.org/ They suck more than they've ever sucked before.

  8. #8

    Re: The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    It's sad to see the toxic influence social media has had on society, and it shows no signs of letting up anytime soon. All you really have to do is go on any of the sites, and you can see it.

    On instagram you see nothing but young women who spend all of their time taking pictures of their tits and ass to upload for strangers on the internet. On Twitter you see nothing but hateful comments between strangers. On facebook you mostly see spreading leftist ideology, lies, and virtue signalling; a bunch of vapid people trying to compete for attention, likes, and friends. People are doing stupid stunts that are literally getting them killed, all for attention on social media. It's just pure degeneracy.

    These people are all miserable. I see them every day, I sell them their antidepressants and anxiety meds. If you look at their social media pages, they have all these bullshit self-help quotes, many of them have them tattooed on their bodies as well. But when you see them out in public, it's a very different picture. They are always unhappy, they are always glued to their phones. They are disheveled, dress sloppy, and have poor hygiene. They are addicted to drugs and alcohol. They have no meaning or purpose in life. It's like they are zombies, aimlessly shuffling through life, but dead inside.

    It's tough to even live in such a toxic society, filled with people under the corrupting influence of social media and leftist propaganda. One of the best things you can do for yourself is to unplug. Go out and live your life, find your calling in the real world. Even if you are alone, it is better than falling into the same deadly trap as everyone else. This is part of what it means to go your own way.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Boar's Avatar
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    Re: The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    Social media = open-source insecurity. If you look at human behavior, the vast majority of our activities are done to reduce our own insecurity. Working, insuring, locking, monitoring, patrolling, and yes, socializing. If one examines their own activities, they will see a pattern emerge. How much of what you do can be traced back to one source of insecurity or another?

    Now add faster ways of communicating and broadcasting. The internet was an incredible propellant for both insecurity and narcissism. Why bother keeping up with the Jones's down the street, when you have the entire world to one up? And you had better one-up the world or you are judged to be a loser and suffer a loss of social status and respect. In this twisted game, there are really only two options: put up a facade or vacate. Sadly, as Xanthine noted above, most choose the facade with the desultory consequences: their online 'life' is much better than their real life. And I am sure that most posters wish their actual lives matched their broadcast personas.

    And that brings me to another point about social media. It is broadcasting. Period. Yes, there may be discussions, but for the most part social media allows one to step into The Grand Movie of My Life and be the leading star. So many opportunities to experience something have been lost because it would not make for a good post. So many friendships have been snubbed because they would not be good supporting actors. The socially devastating outcome from focusing on the social media is that there is little chance to make real connections with another person. It is facade interacting with facade. And when the shit hits the fan, the facade network will do little to help, other than offer inspiring emojis.

    I have always found the term social media to be oxymoronic. It removes peoples' focus from their actual lives to a hypothetical reality that does nothing but cause discontent, anger and frustration.

    So much for worrying about the what the neighbors might think.
    Last edited by Boar; June 28, 2019 at 1:47 AM.

  10. #10
    Senior Member JaydenJazz's Avatar
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    Re: The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    Thanks a bunch everyone. I'm glad to be a part of this community. Sure we may be seen as a fringe group to others but I've found a home in MGTOW, not only it encourages the importance of preservation, independence and freedom but it's a tight brotherhood who always looks out for each other. It's not as fickle as the incel group, not as competitive and prideful as PUAs and not self-righteous or prone to vitual signaling as the SJW army that is just becoming more louder and a lot more annoying.

    I've learned to pace myself when I hit my 30's. I was kinda in the same boat as my friend. I never thought of attempting suicide but I was fairly miserable and unable to secure a relationship, I was just running around like a chicken with it's head cut off. Such is a simple frame of mind when the slightest thought of feeling inadequate will make you go mad. 2016 I will always hold as the most important year of my life. It was kind of a renaissance period. I've shifted from my frame of mind, learned so many things about life in general, the Red Pill, MGTOW, society's indoctrination on the average Joe, consumerism, politics, the whole fucking Pandora's box just exploded on me and gave me a dose of the truth of life. It's a hard pill to swallow and not everyone can handle it but it was what I needed to wake me up.

    Social Media is both a blessing and a curse. I've met a bunch of cool people far from my reach and gave me motivation to travel around, though it's best not to revolve your life around it or become too addicted to it because it can mess with you mentally when left unchecked. I've come to find this place as a good retreat away from the demands of society, I can just chill and shoot the breeze for a bit and have the energy to handle the outside world afterwards. Life goes on and as long as we can manage it one day at a time, it keeps us healthy in mind, body and soul.

  11. #11

    Re: The ills of social media (Sometimes it's best to disconnect)

    Say hello to a major reason I dropped Facebook and Twitter.
    So much easier to ignore all that white noise.


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