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Thread: Introduction

  1. #1
    Junior Member Phaedrus's Avatar
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    Introduction

    Hey guys. I've lurked on the forum for about a week now and thought that it was time for an introduction.


    I swallowed the red pill after a failed relationship in high school/college. After an abrupt ending to a relationship of 3 years, I was devastated. I thought I had done everything a boyfriend ought to do: love letters, flowers, gifts,driving for hours on weekends to see her. I followed the script in the teen romance movies we watched together to a T.


    Yet, throughout the relationship, I sensed that something was off. No matter what I did, she had at least a few emotional breakdowns/cry sessions a month. I didn't understand why, as she came from a much more privileged background than I did and had all the opportunities in the world. Her emotional insecurities and negative thinking were a turn off, but I told myself that a boyfriend ought to provide the non-judgmental unconditional support she required (notice how much societal bullshit programming I followed). I was her therapist, driver, and emotional tampon. But I didn't care, because, hey, for the first time in my life, I was getting laid.


    Looking back, I can honestly say I was never in love with her. I was in love with the way she made me feel and the emotional validation it provided. For the first time in my life, I was receiving romantic love, or at least a vestige thereof.This of course translated into an incredible neediness which makes me cringe when I think back to how I behaved in the relationship. As you can guess, she broke up with me and I found out afterward that she had cheated on me.


    After this relationship, I was devastated. I searched online for what I had done wrong. Instead, I soon stumbled upon communities of men that expressed dissatisfaction with their interactions with women. While at the time many of their observations came off as sexist (to my still blue pill, societal programming), I couldn't help but notice they matched the experiences I had in my first relationship. The hypergamous nature of women,their fickleness, their ability to take and not give back all clicked with what I had experienced first hand.


    With every relationship after that, I was able to confirm the red pill observations and principles I read online. These relationships allowed me to internalize the red pill,where before I had only subscribed to the ideas on an intellectual level. Empiricist at heart


    To me, going your own way means:
    -doing whatever is in your best interest. Not only in your interactions with women, but in your work,family, hobbies, and all of the interactions in between.


    -not finding validation in women, but in your values, efforts, or mission


    -eliminating self-limiting beliefs


    -maximizing personal freedom in a world that tries to enslave you




    I haven't written off relationships with women. The only thing that has changed is that I view the women in my romantic life as guilty until proven innocent. This means that I do not get emotionally invested in them until they have proven they are worthy of my time, attention, money, and love.


    A bit more about me:
    I'm in my mid-20's, have an accounting/finance background, and live in Central Europe. Interests include frugal living, weightlifting, traveling, music, bicycle repair, reading, Buddhism, Stoicism, political philosophy/anarcho-capitalism/libertarianism, gardening, cooking, and board games.

  2. #2
    Senior Member BeijaFlor's Avatar
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    Re: Introduction

    Welcome, Phaedrus! I'm impressed with your insight, and the way you saw through the Great Game.

    Quote Originally Posted by Phaedrus View Post
    Looking back, I can honestly say I was never in love with her. I was in love with the way she made me feel and the emotional validation it provided. For the first time in my life, I was receiving romantic love, or at least a vestige thereof.This of course translated into an incredible neediness which makes me cringe when I think back to how I behaved in the relationship.
    In other words, you were "in love with love" ... and I believe this is the illusion that brings men once-burned, twice-burned, repeatedly-burned, back to the flame. We get addicted to "the dizzy, dancing way you feel," as Judy Collins put it in her Sixties hit "Both Sides Now." And it is every bit as addictive as cigarettes, or whiskey, or nose-candy or smack. Actually, Rodgers & Hammerstein covered it well in their Broadway musical version of "Cinderella," with their song "Falling In Love With Love" (the link is to a Julie Andrews recording):

    Falling in love with love is falling for make-believe,
    Falling in love with love is playing the fool ...

    So glad to have you with us ... I'll be looking forward to hearing more from you.
    "The Red Pill is the start of the journey, not the end." - Chairborne

    "Our most dangerous enemies are men who have no loyalty to men." - William Noy

    "I am not going to sacrifice my freedom and wealth for your ideals." - Primus Pilus

    "If you can't be happy on you're own, you can't be happy -- full stop." - Wilfred

    My introduction: I Was MGTOW When MGTOW Wasn't Cool...

    My blog: Beyond The Sunset

  3. #3
    Senior Member YourTipOfTheDay's Avatar
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    Re: Introduction

    Great intro, Phaedrus. King of the Hill is my favorite animated adult comedy show.

    Welcome to the forum.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Indianajohn's Avatar
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    Re: Introduction

    welcome!
    No matter how attractive a woman is. No matter how beautiful she is. Somewhere, out there, some guy is sick of her shit.

  5. #5
    Senior Member John Deer's Avatar
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    Re: Introduction

    Welcome to the kingdom of the of the new.


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