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  1. #1
    Senior Member Opaque's Avatar
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    Pretending to be gay at work.

    So I have previously written that I have a cunt for a manager.
    She is sleeping with the MD and she was made manager in only one year.

    She sucks him very well from what I hear (other females gossiping with me) and whenever she has a business trip, the always go together, especially if it is outside of the country... and they come back, her hair is always messy.

    Up until now, I have never thought about the workplace as a place where you must (to a certain extent) strategise..
    But now I see the benefits of strategising.......

    One thing I have done is become more effeminate and behave like I'm a homosexual.
    I have to say, this was just an experiment and I didn't think it would work out so well... but it has done wonders..

    The manager cunt now is quite nice to me and other women at work see me as less of a threat.

    So I have two questions:


    1. How can I use the knowledge that she is having sex with the MD to my advantage?
    2. How can I use my gayness to my advantage in the workplace?

  2. #2
    Senior Member Unboxxed's Avatar
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    2. How can I use my gayness to my advantage in the workplace?
    Quick! Apply for a promotion!
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

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  3. #3
    Senior Member Nuggets's Avatar
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Not related directly to your topic, but I've always found it amusing that college campuses work overtime to get LGBTQABCXYZ123 people laid.

    Non-stop events, non-stop promotion of their sexuality, unlimited free condoms everywhere, drag shows, workshops, etc. Think about it...you have an entire support system ostensibly dedicated to "self-expression" and "inclusion", but damn, they must be getting sex 24/7.

    Imagine if straight men had entire departments dedicated to helping them "explore" their straightness, supporting them every step of the way and telling them how great it is that they have penises and enjoy vaginas. Imagine if they could attend events where sexuality is both the explicit topic and the subtext. Never gonna happen, just a thought experiment.
    "The hours of folly are measured by the clock; but of wisdom, no clock can measure" - William Blake

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  4. #4
    Senior Member Eddie Willers's Avatar
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    You're on a fool's errand, brother!

    It is well known, and accepted, that teh wimminz have no sense of honour; among themselves especially. I am afeared that the level of backstabbing and generalized cattiness will try to involve you in their dramas - I don't see that pleading to be of teh ghey is going to help.
    A gun-toting, weed-smoking, gray-bearded redneck with a Masters - old and dangerous.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Don Keyknob's Avatar
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by Opaque View Post
    So I have two questions:


    1. How can I use the knowledge that she is having sex with the MD to my advantage?
    2. How can I use my gayness to my advantage in the workplace?

    Lol

    Get one of your mates to ring up the MD with one of those Stephen Hawking robot voices, telling him that he knows what's going on and if Mr Opaque doesn't get a promotion, massive pay rise and 6 weeks extra holiday entitlement a year - the shit will hit the fan. And make sure you are highly visible while the phone call takes place.

    Bit of blackmail never hurt anybody!!

  6. #6

    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by Opaque View Post

    So I have two questions:


    1. How can I use the knowledge that she is having sex with the MD to my advantage?
    2. How can I use my gayness to my advantage in the workplace?
    1. If the bitch ever in any way messes with you, hint at your knowledge of the affair. Also, make some jokes about about the affair when around other co-workers. Say shit like "He really isn't happy", "It takes a man to please a man", etc. Word will spread around and the bitch manager will be nervous.

    2. See above. Also, if anyone messed with you then threaten them legally. Say "The ACLU wouldn't like to hear this....." etc.

    I have pretended to be gay at times to extract information from women. It has worked every time.

  7. #7

    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by Don Keyknob View Post
    Lol

    Get one of your mates to ring up the MD with one of those Stephen Hawking robot voices, telling him that he knows what's going on and if Mr Opaque doesn't get a promotion, massive pay rise and 6 weeks extra holiday entitlement a year - the shit will hit the fan. And make sure you are highly visible while the phone call takes place.

    Bit of blackmail never hurt anybody!!
    Don't over do it. You don't want to get the guy fired or anything that puts him in jeopardy. If you plan to make comments make them indirectly. Be sneaky like a woman. Don't say or do anything just flat out. Take this for example. The OP mentioned the boss and the guy she is having an affair with always go on trips together. Make a snide but sneaky comment to the bitch manager next time she goes on a trip. Say something like "Have fun.....Oh what am I saying? I know you will." and then smile.

  8. #8
    Senior Member Eiji's Avatar
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Pretending to be gay????
    Sorry Program... but I've been mistaken for gay more times than I care to count..
    and regarding that "COSMOS" was one of my fav PBS shows... I can count quite a bit...
    Last edited by Eiji; December 12, 2017 at 10:45 PM.
    "I live in freedom, under my own flag." - Captain Harlock

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  9. #9
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    I think it's better to pretend to be in a relationship, like having a "Canadian" girl-friend. I sometimes pretend to have a gf in a city 1.2 hour (by plane) north of my city and tell them, if asked, I go there or she comes to me on weekends or on holidays. Gays have been doing it for decades.

  10. #10

    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Pretending to be gay is excellent camouflage in a PC working environment. It will discourage you being laid off, and will force the company to hesitate any adverse actions against you without consulting HR and Legal departments, for fear of a backlash. It is a way of getting some of the privileges that women have.
    "His name is Ace Francis."

  11. #11

    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by Eiji View Post
    Pretending to be gay????
    Sorry Program... but I've been mistaken for gay more times than I care to count..
    and regarding that "COSMOS" was one of my fav PBS shows... I can count quite a bit...
    That "You are gay" shit is so over played. Everything is considered gay excepted being a heartless jerk. When I get asked if I'm gay I like to play along with a few head games. If it's a woman that says it then I say "Why? Are you jealous because I can get more dick than you?" . Leaves them shocked and speechless. If a guy says it then I say "Aw, Are you asking me out? I don't think I'm your type!" then walk away. If they ask it and its someone you can't stand and/or at work then go to the supervisor or whoever is in charge and threaten them with the ACLU and mention your attorney even if you don't have one then open the phone book and memorize one. I've done it and let's say I was left alone and not deal with retards anymore. Nobody likes attorneys so Let them shit themselves.

    Act like 1:40 to 1:50 of this video.

  12. #12
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by Opaque View Post

    So I have two questions:


    1. How can I use the knowledge that she is having sex with the MD to my advantage?
    2. How can I use my gayness to my advantage in the workplace?
    I haven't read the rest of this thread yet so please forgive me if I'm seconding any opinions.

    1) Using your knowledge of the situation in this case is a two edged sword. It cuts both ways. Be careful.
    IMO, I find the old Chinese proverb, "Hide your wisdom from fools" to be helpful in situations like this.

    2) DANGER, WILL ROBINSON!

    If you are not gay and pretending to be, you may at some future time be requested for proof. If you are not
    prepared to suck a dick for a promotion or take a load up your rump, I suggest a more demure demeanor.
    Pretend to be in the closet and stick to a very plausible story.

    If you are pretending to be gay, sooner or later the women will try to hook you up with a man and your espionage will
    lead directly to either the unemployment line or a bathroom stall in the mens' room. Remember, Gay men are
    just as sexually aggressive as straight men. You won't get away with back pedaling later by claiming to be a "lesbian
    trapped in a mans' body"

    Damn, Opaque. You play some dangerous games.
    Rep forthcoming.

  13. #13
    Senior Member Eiji's Avatar
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by LastPriory View Post
    If you are not gay and pretending to be, you may at some future time be requested for proof. If you are not
    prepared to suck a dick for a promotion or take a load up your rump, I suggest a more demure demeanor.
    Pretend to be in the closet and stick to a very plausible story.
    yeah.. thats my main reservation about the matter... it can seriously backfire on you....
    "I live in freedom, under my own flag." - Captain Harlock

    "You can always judge a man by the quality of his enemies." - The Doctor, "Remembrance of the Daleks"

    "To the rational mind, nothing is inexplicable.. only unexplained." - The Doctor, "Robots of Death"

    "Who am I writing it for? Only the Thought Police will read it before they wipe it out of existence... but there are some things I've just got to say or I cant stay sane." -- Winston Smith, 1984

  14. #14

    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    [QUOTE=LastPriory;111732]

    2) DANGER, WILL ROBINSON!

    If you are not gay and pretending to be, you may at some future time be requested for proof. If you are not
    prepared to suck a dick for a promotion or take a load up your rump, I suggest a more demure demeanor.
    Pretend to be in the closet and stick to a very plausible story.

    If you are pretending to be gay, sooner or later the women will try to hook you up with a man ....
    [QUOTE=LastPriory;111732]

    If they do that, you win. This is all sexual harassment of the "hostile workplace" type, and some of it sounds like sexharr of the "quid pro quo" type. Document those behaviors or words, take it to HR and any civil rights attorney, and sue.

    [QUOTE=LastPriory;111732]

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    Let them chase you until you catch them.
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  15. #15

    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by Eiji View Post
    yeah.. thats my main reservation about the matter... it can seriously backfire on you....
    If anyone asks you to prove being queer then threaten them with a sexual harassment lawsuit. Isn't it discrimination to single out gays? Well....what are they doing if they ask you.....? I rest my case. It's time the fucktards got a taste of their own medicine.

  16. #16
    Senior Member Eiji's Avatar
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by MGTOWFOREVER View Post
    If anyone asks you to prove being queer then threaten them with a sexual harassment lawsuit. Isn't it discrimination to single out gays? Well....what are they doing if they ask you.....? I rest my case. It's time the fucktards got a taste of their own medicine.
    I'd do the same if a girl asked me out (charge her with sexual harassment).. what's good for the gander is good for the goose
    Last edited by Eiji; December 29, 2017 at 9:06 PM.

  17. #17
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Just be careful. Gay men can be thirsty and relentless if they even think they have a chance at you.

  18. #18
    Senior Member Unboxxed's Avatar
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by ???? View Post
    Just be careful. Gay men can be thirsty and relentless if they even think they have a chance at you.
    That comment doesn't sail around here, Four-Question-Marks.

    Ten posts from you across several forum threads, all dated today, and no Intro from you. You had better make an Intro, a valid one, in the appropriate forum or you will get booted out of here.
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

    Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.
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    You're better than any man you outlive.
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    There are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary, and those who don't.

  19. #19

    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by ???? View Post
    Just be careful. Gay men can be thirsty and relentless if they even think they have a chance at you.
    What makes you say that?

  20. #20
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    Re: Pretending to be gay at work.

    Quote Originally Posted by MGTOWFOREVER View Post
    What makes you say that?
    Just a few unfortunate experiences. Gay friends who I've made it perfectly clear to that I am straight who then later think that it's their chance to grab my dick when I'm drunk, high, or even just plain tired. But I realize that my few experiences are not necessarily representative of all.


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