
Originally Posted by
May 7 2020
My ex insisted on decorating the house. She thought 200 birdhouses would look good. She also thought several dozen large baskets full of lace doilies, broken dishes, colored feathers, old 45 records, and other useless shit would be good too. Her friend sold candles, we had an entire warehouse of candles in a closet. More candles than were ever burned in the entire 14th century. Pillows with pithy sayings, on couches, on the toilet tank, and under the fish tank, on windowsills, all over the place. She had 12 pillows on the bed, and would get pissed if I didn't place them properly. Then there was the twisted wrought iron crap from the candle chick. Then there were the photographs in plain black frames....scads of these. What am I forgetting, oh yes, holiday houses, Christmas villages, and then she was orgasmic when stores started swelling Halloween village bullshit. We also had those Christmas and Halloween inflatable things, outdoor decorations, maybe 30 of them. She was into decorating cakes, and so there was cake decoration shit everywhere.
I hated all of it. Money pissed away. I had to dust this garbage. I was allergic to the candles, and I would throw a handful away every day, then she would go to another fukn candle party and bring home more candles and wrought iron bullshit. I hated that it was my job to help her hang this shit, dust this shit, I really hated telling her it looked good. She would call the candle shilling hoe and order shit late at night while looking on line, and this crap would show up via UPS, and my ex would call every hour asking me if it arrived. Sometimes I would make it disappear if I didn't have to sign for it. Half the time she forgot about it by the time she got home from work.
I forgot. Precious Moments figurines. Creepy bulbous big eyes looking children. She commissioned a special cabinet from a custom furniture maker, lights, glass shelves and a sound system, yes this thing has a cd player and speakers in it... This garbage was insured because she claimed some pieces were rare. She bought a Persian rug to put in front of this shrine, and no one but her was allowed to be on the rug. Dog liked to scoot across this rug, wiping her ass on this $5000 rug. She would visit the shrine once a week, play the twinkly music and dust these things with a fine paintbrush wearing white cotton gloves.