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  1. #21
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by Azure Nomad View Post
    Younger women will do this all the time for a free meal ticket and even for the friend they bring along. Young guys don't set up healthy boundaries and as a result they are taken advantage of. Women learn to be very machiavellian at an early age to obtain resources while teenager boys are still learning the ropes and just want to have a good time. It takes a lot of experience and built up wisdom for a man to shake off the brainwashing and to actually clearly delineate boundaries and lines that must not be crossed.
    I remember this new girl's phone number I got in my early 20s (in the mid 1990s). I invited her over to my place. She asked if she could bring her friends over. I said sure. Big mistake.

    While at least it was all female friends, the problem was that was they all lived with their parents in the VA suburbs of DC. Here I was in NW DC with my own place. Obviously, while they were polite enough and all, it was obvious to me that my place was just cooler to hang out at than their own since they still lived with Mommy and Daddy. By not setting a boundary that I would not be doing first dates/get togethers with other friends, I essentially friendzoned myself. Not telling her what I should've which was, "no I'm not gonna be hanging with your friends till I get to know you at least, just you come over." That was the first and the last time I ever subjected myself to hanging out with a prospective date's pals before hanging out with her alone. Of course, I did not call her again nor did she call me again. 20/20 hindsight says she obviously had LOW interest level

    But if I could do it over again, I would've said, "obviously you're not terribly attracted to me if you want a place to hang out at that is more laid back than your parent's place. Go find some other teenager-found-a-place-without-parental-supervision zone."

    Anyway, yeah, just like you said, younger men especially have to put down some boundaries.

  2. #22
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    I added some details to clarify the post:


    I just want to point something out. Women feel insecure , but can express freely when they are around people that they know. (because they have a "safe zone")

    Perhaps this happens with the women that you met - especially because they barely know you.

    It is quite frightening to be at a first date, especially if you have second thoughts regard how you look (feel insecure). (this is regard the woman. At an age she does not look as she used to)

    Having friends around may prove rejuvenating especially when you feel cornered. (talking regard the woman)

    If you over-reacted... What do you truly believe? Have you? Have you not? (because I do not know and I will not even presume. I am not in your shoes.)

    Deep down, you know the answer. (This does not imply anything. Truly only YOU know the true answer. I do not know.)

    Perhaps you were imagining things, perhaps you were just honest or perhaps you were cautious or something else. (These are presumptions. Not accusations. As I stated before, only you know the truth)


    Anyway, ask yourself and you will know the truth. But be sincere, always be sincere with yourself and do not mute your conciousness. (This does not accuse you. It is just something that I apply in my life. And I thought it is a good advice for anyone)
    Last edited by Andrew; October 26, 2015 at 3:14 PM.

  3. #23
    Administrator Unboxxed's Avatar
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ace Francis View Post
    Anyway, yeah, just like you said, younger men especially have to put down some boundaries.
    Many years ago, I was trying to reconnect with a girl I used to know. She lived in another state than me. We'd been talking awhile. She seemed interested. At some point, over the phone, I invited her to spend a week with me in a timeshare in a third state. We would meet there. Accommodations were on me. All was going well on that idea until, in a subsequent phone call, she asked me if she could bring a friend.

    I thought she understood that the idea was to spend time alone together to try to rekindle. After all, I did not invite her to spend a week with me and my buddy! I then realized that her friend would be her insurance so that she would not have to try too hard. As an escape, she could always take off with her friend someplace (aka ditch me). Then, too, any friend she would bring along could never serve as a mere insurance filler between spending time alone with me. Nope. I mean, what woman will invite a friend and then ignore her to any degree? I imagined her inviting her friend by saying it would be such fun, they could do things together, etc. That's how you invite a friend and that does not sound like someone who will be ignored while she tries to be alone with me. I imagined them talking this all out in advance. This would be a week of fun for them. And since I always rent a car, gee, I could be their driver. All that was needed was for me to say... Yes.

    I told her no, and I told her why. Now she knew that I knew. I scotched the whole idea since she and I weren't on the same page after all, even as she seemed to not understand. Yeah, right. What else is she going to say to this? That she planned to use me? Go ahead and enjoy your lack of understanding, lady. Enjoy it with your friend, as I am outta here.

    I enjoyed my timeshare alone. No problem. Regret avoided.
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

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  4. #24
    Administrator jagrmeister's Avatar
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by Andrew View Post
    I just want to point something out. Women feel insecure and they can express freely when they are around people that they know. Perhaps this happens with the women that you met - especially because they barely know you. It is quite frightening to be at a first date, especially if you have second thoughts regard how you look (feel insecure). Having friends around may prove rejuvenating especially when you feel cornered. If you over-reacted... What do you truly believe? Have you? Have you not? Deep down, you know the answer. Perhaps you were imagining things, perhaps you were just honest or perhaps you were cautious or something else. Anyway, ask yourself and you will know the truth. But be sincere, always be sincere with yourself and do not mute your conciousness.
    Seriously? If a woman is into you, she'll do the bare minimum which is go on a date with you.




    She's scared?? How many fake rape charges do men lob at women? How many times do men cause women to get into a fistfight.


    What do you truly believe?
    Here's what I truly believe.....as a newbie, you need to dispense less advice and listen more. Some of what you read here will re-write what you thought you knew about women -- and consequently fair expectations we ought to have of them.

    Some of you may be wondering -- who is this Jagrmeister guy? Have a look at some of my posts from MGTOW Forums--> Jagr Archive (collection of my articles)



    Stuff I do: Box, Surf, Tennis (3.5/4.0), Downhill skiing. I lift 4x a week and have for 10 years.
    Stuff I like: Comedy shows, NBA, Reading Non-Fiction (sociology, philosophy, biographies).
    Random facts: I admire Steve Jobs. Favorite travel spots (Russia, Central America).
    *If you're on Twitter, follow me: MGTOW_Jagr

  5. #25
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by jagrmeister View Post
    Seriously? If a woman is into you, she'll do the bare minimum which is go on a date with you.
    Sadly, in all of my experiences, the woman is shy and I believe, from what I saw around me, that women remain shy in time. The ones whom are bold and ask you out are very rare.

  6. #26
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    You sound too much like DanLimitless
    Quote Originally Posted by Andrew View Post
    Sadly, in all of my experiences, the woman is shy and I believe, from what I saw around me, that women remain shy in time. The ones whom are bold and ask you out are very rare.
    I think Mr Wombat has you defined who you appear to be and not appear to be correctly. I think you should stop trolling my thread and go to the Opposite Views section as Mr Wombat suggested to you yesterday.

    Oh, and what a cute one saying that you're a virgin. Trying to paint us MGTOWs as sexless frustrated males. When in truth, the opposite is true. Many of us have been through the family court system via divorce or as in my case, false DV charges.

    You can't MGTOW if you're a virgin. You're as blue pill as they come. Well, that's if you were real. I am not buying this white knighting on my thread as sincere. Nice try, DanLimitless.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Wombat View Post
    Oh, Andrew's post is a fine place to practice your pattern recognition. Whip out the ol'e catalog of anti-male shaming tactics https://exposingfeminism.wordpress.com/shaming-tactics/

    "I was curious to see things that are alike and things that are different between MGTOW and feminazi.
    I wanted and still want to see if:
    ->MGTOW is a hate movement or not."
    Code black (misogynist!), code brown (fascist!)

    "->MGTOW is a movement where men see them-self not as a part of a family any more."
    Code maroon (defeatist!), and possibly a bit of "code bronze", which isn't on the list. The "you'll never leave a legacy!" charge

    "->MGTOW way of seeing life. I want to observe and see if MGTOW fallow PRINCIPLES of FRUSTRATION"
    Code white (crazy!), code purple (sour grapes!).

    "My greatest fear is that, and I mean no offence, MGTOW may push men to: 1) not have a family"
    Code bronze again, code silver (selfish!), and code olive - also not on the list - the charge of failing to do your duty (shirker!)

    " 2) be ego-centric"
    Code silver (selfish!) and olive (shirker!) again

    "3) objectify women"
    Code black (misogynist!) and possibly gold (Bimbo chaser!).

    "4) not want kids"
    Same as 1)

    "6) be lustful "
    Huh. "All you men just think of sex!" is not on the list. It should be.

    Everyone here ought to make themselves familiar with the catalogue of anti-male shaming tactics. It's a basic tool.

    Reading further:
    "I like to see the light in humans and I love to see them being good and thinking outside the box.
    E.g. A bully at school. Thinking outside the box is to encourage the bully, to show him that he matters, that life will change, that you know pain, you understand him and help him fix his problems."

    Bullies do not bully because they feel trapped and in pain. They bully because bullying feels good. It's an animal instinct. To allow then to do this (feel good at other people's expense) when it lies in your power to do something about it is wrong. Young Mr Buddhist has not found the correct way, yet. In the west we have a saying: "There's none so blind as those who will not see."
    Last edited by Ace Francis; October 26, 2015 at 4:29 PM.

  7. #27
    Senior Member Primus_Pilus's Avatar
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    If a woman is really into you, she will crawl across broken glass to suck your dick.
    If she is not, she will make you climb Mt Everest to earn a smile from her.
    First date: A job interview in which a slot-c tries to determine a man's financial suitability in relation to its desire for children.
    Oxytocin, more dangerous than heroin.
    I am not going to sacrifice my freedom and wealth for your ideals.
    If she isn't fucking you like a porn star she is fucking someone else like one.

    Women, they're just a bag of bricks. All you gotta do is set them down. - Primus Milton

  8. #28
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by Primus_Pilus View Post
    If a woman is really into you, she will crawl across broken glass to suck your dick.
    If she is not, she will make you climb Mt Everest to earn a smile from her.
    This is so true. It's easy to forget this occasionally. And no, one should not keep false hopes of them perhaps doing "The Rules" as in playing hard to get. Because even if they were, even if that's the case, the best case scenario, some other guy can deal with her shit. Not me!

    I used to just delete phone numbers. Now if I get some preflake excuse, if they cannot even offer an immediate alternative date (because the ball is in THEIR court at THAT point, one last chance), not only do I delete their number, lately I just call block them as well.

    Because I don't need to feel as if I am 3rd best or whatever among their Chad Thundercock's and beta orbiters

    I don't just use the 50/50 Comminication Rule for women. I use it for my friends and family as well. Never make someone a priority who only sees me as an option.

    That rule does not just apply to new woman I am seeing. It especially applies to ex-girlfriends who think they can just invite themselves into and out of my life however they please. Because if anything, I just don't have the patience any longer to be demoted from being some woman's Sun they revolve around to their Pluto orbit range. (Pluto's not a planet anymore, SPEAKING of demoted planets... Neptune range, I suppose.)
    Last edited by Ace Francis; October 27, 2015 at 4:13 AM.

  9. #29
    Super Moderator Mr Wombat's Avatar
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by Primus_Pilus View Post
    You did just fine. She is 48 thinking She is 20 years younger …
    25 years younger.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ace Francis
    At worst, it was some bitch trying to show off the fact that some chump was gonna buy her free drinks in front of her work pals.
    Nice catch. A chump more than five years younger than her, don't forget.

  10. #30
    Super Moderator Mr Wombat's Avatar
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by Andrew View Post
    I just want to point something out. Women feel insecure , but can express freely when they are around people that they know. (because they have a "safe zone")
    Perhaps this happens with the women that you met - especially because they barely know you.
    It is quite frightening to be at a first date, especially if you have second thoughts regard how you look (feel insecure). (this is regard the woman. At an age she does not look as she used to)
    Having friends around may prove rejuvenating especially when you feel cornered. (talking regard the woman)
    Shouldn't women, too, try to "see the light" in people?
    Shouldn't women, too, act out of "belief" rather than "frustration"?

  11. #31
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    You're speaking in a language he/she/it does NOT understand. The Gender Studies department will NOT appreciate your bullshit OPPRESSIVE LANGUAGE...fuck shit, god DAMMIT, Mr Wombat. It's WOMYN,! Not women or woman!!

    Now we're on the same wave length as this troll, Andrew THE TROLL. YAY!

    Attached Images Attached Images

  12. #32
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Wombat View Post
    Shouldn't women, too, try to "see the light" in people?
    Shouldn't women, too, act out of "belief" rather than "frustration"?
    All humans should. That is correct.

  13. #33
    Senior Member BeijaFlor's Avatar
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Doesn't matter whether you're a missionary or a concern-troll, Andrew.

    Go peddle your shame-and-blame elsewhere.
    "The Red Pill is the start of the journey, not the end." - Chairborne

    "Our most dangerous enemies are men who have no loyalty to men." - William Noy

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  14. #34
    Senior Member Primus_Pilus's Avatar
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by BeijaFlor View Post
    Doesn't matter whether you're a missionary or a concern-troll, Andrew.

    Go peddle your shame-and-blame elsewhere.
    Ok how the he'll did that banned white knight cuckold wind up with a reputation of -157???
    That's actually a fairly impressive crappy number racked up before a ban.
    First date: A job interview in which a slot-c tries to determine a man's financial suitability in relation to its desire for children.
    Oxytocin, more dangerous than heroin.
    I am not going to sacrifice my freedom and wealth for your ideals.
    If she isn't fucking you like a porn star she is fucking someone else like one.

    Women, they're just a bag of bricks. All you gotta do is set them down. - Primus Milton

  15. #35
    Senior Member BeijaFlor's Avatar
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Glad to explain - here's how:

    If you click the yellow star to the right of "Like this post," you get a "Reputation" dialog-box. You can choose to "approve" or "disapprove" of the post. If you approve, you add points to the poster's reputation; if you disapprove, you subtract reputation-points.
    "The Red Pill is the start of the journey, not the end." - Chairborne

    "Our most dangerous enemies are men who have no loyalty to men." - William Noy

    "I am not going to sacrifice my freedom and wealth for your ideals." - Primus Pilus

    "If you can't be happy on you're own, you can't be happy -- full stop." - Wilfred

    My introduction: I Was MGTOW When MGTOW Wasn't Cool...

    My blog: Beyond The Sunset

  16. #36

    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by BeijaFlor View Post
    Glad to explain - here's how:

    If you click the yellow star to the right of "Like this post," you get a "Reputation" dialog-box. You can choose to "approve" or "disapprove" of the post. If you approve, you add points to the poster's reputation; if you disapprove, you subtract reputation-points.

    I for one did not know that. I had only considered the reputation star for comments to which I approved. I never saw the point of being negative, but I now see there can be a case for it.

  17. #37
    Senior Member Cap285's Avatar
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Under no circumstances should you meet her friends (uh, co-workers) on a first date. Nor, anytime soon thereafter.

    Eject.

  18. #38

    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ace Francis View Post
    Great suggestions and observations, Jagr. Yeah, if this date will happen, I think I'll be picking the place like you suggested.

    Either it happens in my frame (albeit my alternate place is still near her neighborhood and not mine), or fuck it!

    Thanks for saying I was not crazy for my response. It's just that I had a 6-pack of Coors beer and I fired off that "nah, no co-workers" sort of text.

    I felt it was slightly abrasive yet rightgeous.

    Yet did not know if I went too far at it?!

    Jagr, you are pretty solid at keeping your cool yet maintaining a fair yet firm hand.

    So if you say it is right, that makes me feel better for being slightly aggressive in essentially saying, "I'll see you, but not under your terms" sort of thing.

    Thanks, bro.
    Brother, many a time I have re-thought something because I'd had a few beers when I'd initially made the decision. You're perfectly fine on this one, though.

  19. #39
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Thanks for sharing

  20. #40
    Administrator Unboxxed's Avatar
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    Re: Did I overreact saying "no co-workers" on first date?

    Quote Originally Posted by sasamu View Post
    Thanks for sharing
    sasamu, let's recap.

    You registered today and posted 11 times today, all of them say only one thing "Thanks for sharing."

    The other 10 posts are all in Opposing views, except this one. This one would be my invite to ask you to post an Intro but I don't think you are here for that.

    Your signature is a link to an escort service, n'est-ce pas? I see where this is going.

    I am going to contact the Moderators with the intent of having you bounced out of here asap.
    The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why. - Mark Twain

    The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.
    - Henry David Thoreau

    There are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary, and those who don't.

    Suitable for bookmarking: www.fakehatecrimes.org and www.breitbart.com/tag/hate-crime-hoax and register-her.net


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